A GREY VOID - SWIRLS OF THREATENING, EVER-CHANGING STORM-SKY COLOR A CHILLING "PHANTOM OF THE OPERA" ORGAN CHORD". A VOICE NOT UNLIKE GOD'S (OR ORSON WELLES') INTONES TH^ FOLLOW ING "PROLOGUE." SIMULTANEOUSLY, THE WORDS SCROLL SLOW LY ACROSS THE SCREEN. VOICE: On the twenty-third day of the month of September, in an early year of a decade not too long before our own, the human race * suddenly encountered a deadly threat to its very existence, ... VOICE: And this terrifying enemy surfaced — as such enemies often do — in the seemingly most innocent... and unlikely... of places... THE CHURCH-LIKE MUSIC CLIMAXES IN A DRUM ROLL AS WE SEE LIGHT DROPLETS OF WATER HITTING AND CAUSING RIPPLES IN THE IMAGE. IMMEDIATELY, BUBBLEGUM-ROCK MUSIC KICKS IN AS CAMERA PULLS BACK TO REVEAL THAT THE ABOVE-MENTIONED GREY VOID IS REALLY A PUDDLE OF MUCK IN A FOUL SKID ROW GUTTER AND THAT A WINO IS PASSED OUT BESIDE IT, -HIS LONG BLACK HAIR SOAKING IN THE GOO. EXT. MUSHNIK'S SKID ROW FLORIST'S SHOP - DAY - DARK CLOUDY SKY A RUN-DOWN STOREFRONT FLOWER SHOP, JUST BEYOND THE GUT TER. THE BUILDING IS SO OLD, SO FORLORN, SO DILAPI DATED, IT SEEMS TO LEAN TO ONE SIDE. SONG: Little Shop Little Shoppa Horrors Little Shop Little Shoppa Terror Call a cop! Little Shoppa Horrors No Oh Oh Oh No-ohl THE TITLE FADES OUT AND ON ANOTHER LIGHTNING FLASH WE CUT TO A DIFFERENT ANGLE OF THE SHOP AS THREE GIRLS, CRYSTAL, RONETTE AND CHIFFON ENTER THE SHOT. THEY ARE THE ONES WE HEARD SINGING IN VOICE-OVER. GIRLS: Little Shop Little Shoppa Horrors Bop sh' bopl Little Shoppa Terror What 'em drop! Little Shoppa Horrors No Oh Oh Oh No-oh! IN THE BACKGROUND OF THE PREVIOUS SHOTS WE'VE SEEN NOT ONLY THE SHOP BUT ALSO: A MALNOURISHED DOG POKING THROUGH AN OVERTURNED GARBAGE CAN, A PRE-1960'S CAR OR TWO PASSING BY, NEWSPAPERS BEING BLOWN BY THE WIND, AND A BUM BEGGING FROM PEOPLE WHO QUICKLY PASS BY GRASPING UMBRELLAS. THE GIRLS NOW TURN AND ENTER THROUGH THE DOORS OF THE SHOP. INT. SHOP - DAY THE PLACE IS A MESS. THE FLOWERS ARE ON THEIR LAST LEGS OR ARE ALTOGETHER DEAD. GIRLS: Shing-a-ling What a creepy thing to be happenin' Shang-a-lang Feel the Sturm-and-Drang . GIRLS: In the air Sha la la Stop right where you are Don'tcha move a thing! THE GIRLS HAVE DANCED PAST A STORAGE ROOM AND OVER TO A MAN WHO IS SITTING AT THE SHOP'S COUNTER READING A NEWSPAPER WHICH HIDES HIS FACE. THE PAPER, "THE SKID ROW HERALD EXAMINER." THE HEADLINE: UNEXPECTED TOTAL ECLIPSE! GIRLS: You'd better Tellin' you, you'd better Tell yo' mama Somethin's gonna get her She'd better Everybody' d better Beware! ON THE WORD "BEWARE" CAMERA FOLLOWS THE GIRLS AS THEY DANCE OVER TO A CLOSED DOOR. THEY OPEN IT AND WE CUT TO A REVERSE SHOT OF THE DOOR AS IT IS BEING OPENED AND THE CAMERA LEADS THE GIRLS DOWN A DINGY FLIGHT OF STAIRS AS THEY SING: GIRLS: Little Shop Little Shoppa Horrors Bob sh' bop You'll never stop the terror AS THE GIRLS REACH THE BOTTOM THEY SING AND DANCE PAST CAMERA TOWARDS . . GIRLS: Little Shop Little Shoppa Horrors No oh oh oh no Oh oh oh oh Oh Oh oh no-oh-oh-oh] ON THE LAST EXTENDED NOTE OF THE SONG THE GIRLS BACK AWAY FROM CAMERA AND WE ARE LEFT ALONE WITH SEYMOUR. AS HE CONTINUES STRUGGLING WE SEE AN OLD BEAT-UP RADIO ON THE LOWER SHELF NEXT TO HIM FROM WHICH WE HEAR: RADIO: At his press conference today. President Kennedy fielded questions concerning last Thursday's total eclipse of the sun, an unpredicted and unprecedented astrological phenomenon which has baffled the nation... DURING THE BROADCAST WE SEE SEYMOUR TEETERING UNTIL FINALLY, LOSING HIS BALANCE, HE GRABS FOR THE SHELF AND WITH A PATHETIC WHIMPER HE FALLS TAKING IT, SOME POTTED PLANTS, COMIC BOOKS, CLOTHING, JUNK, AND RADIO DOWN WITH HIM. SFX: CRASH! SEYMOUR HAS DROPPED OUT OF SHOT. WE HOLD ON WHAT'S LEFT OF THE WALL AS WE HEAR... MDSHNIK: Seymour, what is going on down there? ! Seymour pops BACK UP INTO FRAME IN A FULL-FACE CLOSEUP and shouts: SEYMOUR: Very little, Mr. Mushnik! INT. SHOP - DAY MUSHNIK: Aron, g'vorn, g'voxen, akebebble, mitzbeleh. INT. BASEMENT - DAY I • WE HAVE CUT TO ANOTHER ANGLE OF SEYMOUR TO SEE THAT THE GIRLS ARE NO LONGER THERE AND TO SEE THAT WE ARE IN: THE BASEMENT . THESE DARK SURROUNDINGS HAVE BEEN TRANS FORMED INTO SEYMOUR'S PATHETIC LIVING QUARTERS WITH CLOTHING, A HOTPLATE, JUN'- ^OOD CONTAINERS, A SLEEPING COT, AND CRUD EVERYWHERE. SEYMOUR STARTS PICKING UP THE MESS HE'S MADE. HE STARTS WITH THE RADIO WHICH IS TURNED OVER ON THE FLOOR AND WHICH IS NOW EMITTING STATIC. RADIO: He gets up each morning and he goes downtown. Where everyone's his boss and he's lost in an angry land. He's a little man. But then he comes Uptown each evening to my tenement..,. RADIO: As he's picking through the mess Seymour notices a par- ticular plant amongst the others that has fallen on the floor. RADIO: He worriedly picks it up, puts back the dirt in its Maxwell House coffee can and places it under a special gro-light, giving the feeling that the plant has its own theatrical spotlight. The plant is clearly on its last legs. RADIO: Its avocado-like pod is withered and dry, its leaves are brown and its little tendrils resemble a polio victim. He tends to it with great care. SFX: {O.S.) HIGH HEELS ON CONCRETE. SEYMOUR HEARS THE SOUND OF HIGH HEELS CLICKING QUICKLY IN THE DISTANCE. HIS EXPRESSION CHANGES TO ONE OF LONGING AS HE TURNS AND GOES TO THE BASEMENT WINDOW AND LOOKS OUT. EXT. SKID ROW STREET - RAIN HAS STOPPED - DAY ( CAMERA IS NOW ACROSS THE STREET AT AN EXTREME LOW ANGLE, WE SEE SEYMOUR'S HOPEFUL FACE THROUGH THE BASE MENT WINDOW IN THE BACKGROUND AS A CAR PASSES. IN THE EXTREME FOREGROUND A BUM IS SPRAWLED OUT ON THE SIDEWALK. THE SOUND OF THE CLICKING HEELS IS UPON US NOW AS A PAIR OF BLACK PUMPS ENTERS FRAME STEPPING OVER THE BUM. CAMERA MOVES WITH THE FEET UNTIL THEY ARE NOW WALKING TOWARDS CAMERA. SHE IS RUSHING TOWARDS CAMERA. WE SEE SHE HAS A BLACK EYE. INT. SHOP - DAY DOOR CHIME. MUSHNIK LOOKS UP TO SEE AUDREY ENTER HUR RIEDLY. MUSHNIK: So, she finally decides to come to work? AUDREY: Good morning, Mr. Mushnik. MUSHNIK: What morning? It's almost closing time. Not that we had a customer. A LOUD CRASH from the basement. MUSHNIK: What in the name of God is going on down there? Audrey, you'd better go see what he's... ... Audrey... where did you get that shiner? AUDREY: Shiner? INT. STORAGE ROOM AUDREY STARTS TO HANG UP HER COAT AND PUT ON HER UNI FORM, A FRILLY PINK SMOCK. MUSHNIK FOLLOWS HER IN. MUSHNIK: Audrey, that greasy boyfriend of yours, he's beating up on you again? Look, I know it's none of my business, but I'm beginning to think he's maybe not such a nice boy. AUDREY: You don^t meet nice boys when you live on Skid Row, Mr. Mushnik. Seymour comes up from downstairs carrying a precarious ly balanced pile of clay pots.' SEYMOUR: I got these pots unloaded for you, Mr. Mushnik... But even before the sentence is finished, he has lost his footing. Seymour and the pots fall to the floor with an EAR-SPLITTING CRASH, identical to the ones we have heard before. MUSHNIK: Seymour 1 Look what you've done to the inventory! AUDREY: Don't yell at Seymour, Mr. Mushnik. SEYMOUR: Hi, Audrey. You look radiant today. Is that new eye makeup? AUDREY: I'll help him clean it up before any customers get here. MUSHNIK: Well, that oughta give you plenty of time. Mushnik moves through the shop toward the front door. MUSHNIK: Look, God, what an existence I got. EXT. STREET - DAY ! MUSHNIK: Misfit employees, bums on the sidewalk, business is lousy... my life is a living hell. HE NOTICES CRYSTAL, ^ONETTE AND CHIFFON LOUNGING IDLY ON THE STOOP NEXT DOOI TO THE SHOP. MUSHNIK: You! Ui^chins! Off the stoopi It ain't bad enough I got the winos permanently decorating the storefront? I need three worthless ragamuffins to complete the picture? The Girls start walking away as they speak. RONETTE: Oh, we ain't botherin' nobody. Are we. Crystal? CRYSTAL: No we're not, Ronette. MUSHNIK: You oughta be in school. CRYSTAL: We on the split-shift. RONETTE: Right. We went to school 'til the fifth grade. Then we split. Mushnik has stopped following them. MUSHNIK: So how do you intend to better yourself? CRYSTAL: Better ourselves? You heard what he said. Chiffon? Better ourselves? Mister, when you from Skid Row, ain't no such thing. The Girls turn the corner into a darkened, narrow street where we see trash cans and fire escapes, and a WING lying amidst the filth. CRYSTAL: About twenty yards in the distance we see a WOMAN. She is in her fifties, wear- ing a working uniform. She could be a waitress or a maid. An old, worn coat hangs from her shoulders. SHE SEEMS VERY TIRED AND WALKS VERY SLOWLY TOWARD CAMERA. MASIC: INTRO TO "DOWNTOWN/SKID ROW." WOMAN: Alarm goes off at seven And you start uptown You put"' in your eight hours for the powers That have always been. RONETTE: Sing it, child. WOMAN: Till it's five P.M. WINO: Then you go, . . HE FALLS BACK DOWN. THE GIRLS JOIN THE WOMAN AS THEY WALK UP THE NARROW STREET TO THE MAIN SKID ROW STREET. WOMAN AND GIRLS: Downtown, where the folks are broke Downtown, where your life's a joke Downtown, when you buy your token you go. . . Home to Skid Row Home to Skid Row WINO 2: Yes, you go. . . HE FALLS OUT OF SHOT. FROM AROUND A CORNER, FROM AN ALLEYWAY, FROM A FIRE ESCAPE, FROM A TENEMENT BUILDING... MORE PEOPLE (MAIDS, JANITORS, BUS BOYS, BAG LADIES, WAITRESSES, BUMS, MESSENGERS, ETC.) JOIN THE WOMAN AND THE GIRLS. NEW PERSON 1: Downtown, where the cabs don't stop. NEW PERSON 2: fin a tenement window) Downtown, where the food is slop. PERSON 2 joins the others on the street. NEW PERSONS 3 & 4: Downtown, where the hop-heads flop In the snow! ALL: Down on Skid Row! Down on Skid Row! ALL: Uptown you cater to a million jerks Uptown, you're messenger and mailroom clerks Eating all your lunches at the hot dog carts The bosses take your money and they break your hearts. A 1950 's bus stops and discharges a few more people who join the throng. ALL: And uptown you cater to a million whores You disinfect terrazzo on their bathroom floors Your jobs are really menial, you make no bread And then at five o'clock you head... WINO: By subway... ALL: Downtown. EXT. SHOP - DAY AUDREY IS ON THE SIDEWALK EMPTYING BROKEN CLAY POTS INTO A TRASH CAN. WE SEE THE CHORUS REFLECTED IN THE SHOP' S WINDOW. AUDREY: Where the guys are drips. ALL: Downtown! CONTINUED: 10 AUDREY: Where they rip your slips. ALL: Downtown! AUDREY: Where relationships are no-go! Audrey walks into the street where everyone is posed hyper-dramatically (a la "West Side Story") singing in powerful chorus. She, also singing, moves amongst them. ALL PLUS AUDREY: Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row Down on Skid Row! INT. SHOP - DAY .11 SEYMOUR IS SWEEPING HIS MESS. SEYMOUR: Poor! All my life I've always been poor I keep asking God what I'm for And He tells me, Gee, I'm not sure Sweep that floor kid! Oh! I started life as an orphan, child of the street Here on Skid Row! EXT. SHOP - DAY DURING THE PREVIOUS LYRICS, CAMERA HAS TURNED A FULL DEGREES TO SHOW THE CHORUS IN THE BACKGROUND AND IT NOW FOLLOWS SEYMOUR OUT OF THE SHOP ONTO THE SIDEWALK AS HE SINGS: HE TOOK ME IN, GAVE ME SHELTER A BED, CRUST OF BREAD AND A JOB TREATS ME LIKE DIRT, CALLS ME A SLOB... WHICH I AM SO I LIVE COMTINOED: EVERYONE ON THE STREET IS NOW MOVING, VERY SLOWLY, NOT UNLIKE ZOMBIES. (AUDREY IS NO LONGER WITH THEM.) SEYMOUR JOINS THEM IN THE STREET AND WALKS AMONGST THEM. ALL: Downtown SEYMOUR: That's your home address, you live... ALL: Downtown SEYMOUR: When your life's a mess^ you live... ALL: Downtown SEYMOUR: Where depressions' s jes' status guol ALL: Down on Skid Row! HIGH, WIDE SHOT OF CHORUS IN. BACKGROUND ON MAIN STREET AS SEYMOUR TURNS AND WALKS INTO A NARROW ALLEY. SEYMOUR: Someone show me a way to get outa here 'Cause I constantly pray I'll get outa here Please won't somebody say I'll get outa here Someone gimme my shot or I'll rot here. CAMERA CRANES DOWN WITH SEYMOUR AS HE STOPS IN FRONT OF AN OLD RUSTY CYCLONE FENCE WHICH CREATES A CUL DE SAC. CAMERA IS NOW BEHIND THE FENCE AS WE SEE SEYMOUR THROUGH THE STEEL MESH. SEYMOUR ALL: Show me how and I will Downtown I'll get outa here There's no rules I'll start climbin' For usl Uphill Downtown SEYMOUR: And get outa here Someone teXX me I Still Could get outa here ALL: 'Cause it's dangerous Downtown, where The rainbow's just A no-show I Seymour, feeling trapped, runs out of the a.:' y. SEYMOUR: Someone tell Lady Luck That I'm stuck here When you live. . . DURING THE FOLLOWING WE INTERCUT BETWEEN AUDREY AND SEYMOUR, EACH OF WHOM ARE AT DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE STREET. THEY WANDER ABOUT MELODRAMATICALLY TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM THE FILTH AND DEGRADATION OF SKID ROW. AUDREY: Gee it sure would be Swell to. get outa here Bid the gutter Farewell and get outa here I ' d move heaven and Hell to get .outa Skid... I'd do I dunno what To get outa Skid But a helluvalot To get outa Skid ALL: Downtown Where the sun don't shine Downtown Past the bottom line Downtown • Go ask any wino he'll know . Downtown Downtown Unable to escape from the shackles of Skid Row, and feeling desperately trapped, they stop at either side of a corner building. ALL: They do not see each other as, in an overly drwatic, yet heartfelt plea, they sing to the heavens. The sky becomes lyrical and pink and the entire chorus moves in slow, deliberate, guasi-Jerome Robbins choreography as everyone sings with starry-eyed intensity. AUDREY: People tell me There's not a way Outa Skid But believe ne I gotta get Outa Skid Row ALL: Downtown Skid Row! INT. SHOP - EARLY MORNING MUSHNIK, SEYMOUR AND AUDREY ARE IN THE SHOP, DEPRESSED, GLANCES UP AT THE CLOCK. MUSHNIK, MUSHNIK: Look at that! Six o'clock and we Yiaven* t. sold so much as a fern. All right. That's it. Don't bother coming in tomorrow. AUDREY: You don't mean... SEYMOUR: You can't mean... MUSHNIK: What? What? What don't I mean? 'I mean I'm closed, forget it, kaput. AUDREY: You can't! MUSHNIK: Kaputl Extinct. I'm closing this God and customer forsaken place. SEYMOUR: Mr. Mushnik, forgive me for saying so, but has it ever occurred to you that maybe what the firm needs is to move in a new direction? AUDREY: Seymour, why don't you run downstairs and bring up that strange and interesting new plant you've been working on? Seymour helpfully exits. AUDREY: You see, Mr. Mushnik, some of those exotic plants that Seymour's been tinkering around with are really... unusual... and we were both thinking that maybe some of those strange and interesting plants, prominently displayed and advertised, would attract business. AUDREY: Seymour is now standing behind them holding the same withered plant we saw earlier in the basement. It looks even worse than it did before. CONTINUED; (2) SEYMOUR: I'm afraid it isn't feeling very well today. AUDREY: There, now isn't that... bizarre? MUSHNIK: At least. What kind o£ a weirdo plant is that, Seymour? SEYMOUR: I dunno. It looks like some kinda flytrap, but I haven't been able to identify it in any of my books. So I gave it my own name. I call it an Audrey Two. AUDREY: After me? SEYMOUR: I hope you don't mind, ... You see, sir, if you put a strange and interesting plant like this, here in the window, maybe... MUSHNIK: Maybe what? Do you have any idea how ridiculous you sound? Just because you put a strange and interesting plant in the window, people don't suddenly... A CUSTOMER opens the door to the shop. CUSTOMER: Excuse me. I couldn't help noticing that strange and interesting plant. Mushnik and employees look up in amazement. CUSTOMER: What is it? SEYMOUR: It's an Audrey Two! CUSTOMER ' I've never seen anything like it before. CONTINUED: (3) 13 SEYMOUR: No one has. CUSTOMER: Where did you get it? MUSIC: A HARP? BELLS? SEYMOUR: Well — you remember that total eclipse of the sun a couple of weeks ago? FLASHBACK ("DaDoo"): THROUGH THIS ENTIRE SEQUENCE, WE HEAR SEYMOUR IN V.O. AND SEE HIM IN THE SITUATIONS HE DESCRIBES. EXT. A STYLIZED, ALMOST CALIGARIAN RENDITION OF SIXTH AVENUE IN THE THIRTIES - THE. PLANT DISTRICT. GIRLS: Da Doo. Seymour is walking along, fascinated by the foliage for sale. SEYMOUR: I was walking in the wholesale flower district that day... GIRLS: Shoop Da Do HE PASSES A STRANGE- LOOKING FLORIST'S SHOP, ITS SIGN PRINTED IN CHINESE CHARACTERS. SEYMOUR: And I passed by this place where this old Chinese man. . . CLOSEUP: An elderly Mandarin with a crazed and evil leer. GIRLS: Chang! Da Doo Seymour and the Mandarin shake hands. SEYMOUR: He sometimes sells me weird and exotic cuttings. . . Mandarin chops a leaf off a plant with a dangerous- looking Oriental saber. GIRLS: Snip! Da Doo Mandarin extends the leaf to Seymour. SEYMOUR: 'Cause he knows, ya see, that strange plants are my hobby. Seymour examines it. GIRLS: Da da da da da Da Doo! And decides not to buy it. SEYMOUR: Be didn't have anything unusual there that day. GIRLS: Nope! Da Doo. Seymour starts to walk away. SEYMOUR: So I was just about to, you know, walk on by... GIRLS: Good for you! But suddenly, Seymour stops dead in his tracks. He notices something in the sky! SEYMOUR: When suddenly and without warning — There was this. . . CONTINUED: (2) 14 THE SKY. A total eclipse occurs before our eyes. SEYMOUR & GIRLS: Total eclipse of the suni SEYMOUR: It got very dark. Just as suddenly,: the eclipse is over. We're back on the street and Seymour looks at the Mandarin in puzzlement. The Mandarin glances down at a row of flower buckets containing cut flowers. GIRLS: Da Doo! Among the flower buckets, now, sits one strange and interesting plant — a baby version of... CLOSEUP - THE AUDREY TWO SEYMOUR: And when the light came back, this weird plant was just sitting there. GIRLS: Oops-ee-do! SEYMOUR: Just stuck in, you know, among the zinneas. Seymour picks up the plant and examines it. GIRLS: Aud-ree Twol SEYMOUR: I coulda sworn it hadn't been there before, but the old Chinese man sold it to me anyway . . . Seymour fishes in his pocket for one dollar and some change which he gives to the inscrutable MANDARIN. SEYMOUR: For a dollar ninety-five. Seymour walks up the street, away from us, carrying his new plant. GIRLS & MANDARIN: Sha la la la la la Doo doo doo doo! CONTINUED: (3) 14 EXTREME CLOSEUP OF MANDARIN TURNING TO CAMERA AND FLASHING A KNOWING GRIN. EXTREME CLOSEUP OF THE GIRLS, ALSO SMILING KNOWINGLY TO CAMERA. EXTREME CLOSEUP OF TWO FILTHY BUMS, TNEIR FACES DISTORTED AND SMILING. CAMERA PULLS BACK AND WE SEE WE ARE IN. INT. SHOP - EARLY EVENING THE TWO BUMS ARE NOW IN THE BACKGROUND OUTSIDE THE SHOP. THEIR FACES ARE MUSHED AGAINST THE DISPLAY WINDOW AS THEY LOOK, WITH GREAT CURIOSITY, AT THE OTHERS IN THE SHOP. CUSTOMER: Yessir, that's an unusual story and a fascinating plant. HE TURNS TO LEAVE. MUSHNIK, SEYMOUR AND AUDREY EXCHANGE A LOOK OF MUTUAL DISAPPOINTMENT. CUSTOMER: Oh... I, might as well take fifty dollars' worth of roses while I'm here. MDSHNIK: Fifty dollars? Yessir! Right away, sir I CUSTOMER: Can you break a hundred? KOSHNIK: A hundred. Er, no... CUSTOMER: Well, then I'll just have to take twice as many, won't I? HE HANDS MUSHNIK A HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL. CLOSEUP OF SEYMOUR. SEYMOUR: Twice as many? CLOSEUP of Audrey. AUDREY: Twice as many? CLOr""-P of the two Bums we see outside the window. BUMS: "Twice as many?" The two Bums quickly glance to the front door. CLOSEUP of CUSTOMER 2 opening front door. CUSTOMER 2: That plant in the window, it's simply amazing! CLOSEUP of CUSTOMER 3 opening front door. CUSTOMER 3: That plant in the window, wherever 'd you get it? CLOSEUP of CUSTOMERS 4 and 5 opening front door. CUSTOMER 4: Look, there it is, Marge. CUSTOMER 5 (MARGE) Oh my gosh, it's peculiar 1 ' CLOSEUP of the two Bums as they open the front door. They are about to speak" when a look of fear crosses their faces and they turn and run as all the Customers come piling out of the front door. CUSTOMER 4: They are laden with bunches and bunches of flowers and are excitedly babbling about that amazing plant. MDSHNIK: Thank you! Come again! You know where to find us! Come and look at the weirdo plant some more. It's just gonna get bigger and more interesting! HE COMES INSIDE. THERE ARE NO MORE FLOWERS IN THE SHOP. IS COMTIHUED: (2) 15 MUSHNIK: Well, don't just stand there! Quick, quick, quick. Put that plant. . . what do you call it? SEYMOUR: Audrey Two. MUSHNIK: Put that Audrey Two back in the window where the passersby can see it! I don*t mind admitting I'm wrong when I'm wrong and I'm wrong. My God, I'd never have believed it. My children, I'm taking us all out to dinner! Seymour, excited, looks at Audrey. MUSHNIK: Audrey looks up, intensely disappointed. AUDREY: Oh, I'd like to, Mr. Mushnik, but I have a date. SHE HEADS FOR THE STORAGE ROOM. MUSHNIK FOLLOWS HER IN. MUSHNIK: With the same nogoodnick? INT. COATROOM AUDREY REMOVES HER WORK SMOCK AND STARTS TO PUT ON HER JACKET. MUSHNIK: I'm telling you, Audrey, you don't need a date with him. You need major medical. SHE CLOSES HER JACKET, LOOKS UP MEEKLY, FORCES A SAD, EMBARRASSED SMILE. AUDREY: Enjoy dinner. INT. SHOP AS AUDREY HURRIEDLY PASSES THROUGH, SEYMOUR GAZES AT HER LONGINGLY. CONTINUED: 17 GOODNIGHT, SEYMOUR. SEYMOUR: Goodnight. . . And she's gone. Seymour looks sadly off in her direction. Mushnik emerges from the storeroom. MUSHNIK: Poor girl. SEYMOUR: Are we still going to dinner? Mushnik is about to answer kindly when his eye notices: IT HAS WILTED SINCE WE LAST SAW IT. IT DROOPS OVER THE SIDE OF ITS POT AT A FORTY-FIVE DEGREE ANGLE. MUSHNIK APPROACHES THE PLANT, PICKS IT UP, AND TAKES IT TO SEYMOUR. MUSHNIK: You're not going anywhere, Krelbornl You're staying right here and taking care of this sick plant! SEYMOUR: I told you it's been giving me trouble. It just wilts like this. The Audrey Two is not a healthy girll MUSHNIK: Strictly between us, neither is the Audrey One. SEYMOUR: If only I knew what breed it was, what genus. But it's nowhere in the books. CONTINUED: (2) 17 MDSHNIK: Well, Krelborn, my advice to you is you better figure it out and fast. Look what this exotic- little beauty did for business. SEYMOUR: I know. MUSHNIK: So work, Seymour! Nurse this plant back to health! I'm counting on you! SEYMOUR: I know. MUSHNIK: You do? SEYMOUR: I do. MUSHNIK: So fix! Goodnight! EXT. SKID ROW - A GLOWING, DEEP PINK SUNSET MUSIC IN: THE INTRO TO "GROW FOR ME." AS WE WATCH MUSHNIK DISAPPEAR, SUNSET GIVES WAY TO EVENING. ONE BY ONE, LIGHTS POP ON IN WINDOWS UP AND DOWN THE STREET. INT. THE BASEMENT SEYMOUR IS LOOKING THROUGH THE BASEMENT WINDOW AT. . AUDREY: Standing in the window of her own tenement flat, across the street. She has changed outfits and is now looking into a mirror on her wall, struggling to conceal her black eye with Cover Girl liquid eye makeup. AUDREY: Seymour gazes up at her with painful longing, then returns his attention to his pathetic botanical charge. HE SINGS AS HE WORKS WITH MISTING CAN, SPADE AND FERTILIZET. IT IS AN INTIMATE MOMENT WITH A BOY AND HIS PLANT. SEYMOUR: I've given you sunshine I've given you dirt You've given me nothin' But heartache and hurt. I'm beggin' you sweetly, I'm down on my knees. Oh please, grow for me. I've give you plantfood And water to sip. I've given you potash. You've given me... zip! Oh God, how I mist you. SEYMOUR: Oh pod, how you tease. Now. please, grow for me. Seymour grabs a gardening -book from the shelf and leafs through it. SEYMOUR: I've given you southern exposure To get you to thrive I've pinched you back hard, like I'm S ' posed ta You're barely alive I've tried you at levels of moisture From desert to mud HE GIVES UP FOR A WHILE AND STARTS PUTTING HIS ROOM IN SEMI-ORDER. . SEYMOUR (CONT.) I'VE GIVEN YOU GROW-LIGHTS AND MINERAL SUPPLEMENTS. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? SEYMOUR PICKS UP SOME DEAD ROSES, THE THORNS OF WHICH HAVE PRICKED HIS FINGER. IT BLEEDS JUST A LITTLE... SEYMOUR: Damned roses! Damned thorns! Seymour rummages around through a box to find some band-aids. His finger keeps bleeding. Near him, a light from behind casts the plant's shadow on the wall . Suddenly . . .. THE SHADOW MOVES. IN SILHOUETTE, THE POD HAS OPENED UP, SEYMOUR NOTICES THIS AND TURNS AROUND TO SEE — AUDREY TWO, OPEN WIDE, AS IF ASKING FOR SOMETHING. SEYMOUR MOVES TOWARD IT. IT OPENS WIDER. THE PLANT CLOSES. SEYMOUR NOTICES THIS AND BEGINS TO GET THE IDEA. HE REMOVES THE BAND-AID AND RAISES HIS FINGER IN FRONT OF THE POD. SEYMOUR SLOWLY HIDES HIS FINGER BEHIND HIS BACK. AND JUST AS SLOWLY, THE POD CLOSES. NOW HE TRIES TO TRICK IT. HE MOVES HIS HAND DOWN-UP VERY FAST. SEXMOUR (CENT.) I'VE GIVEN YOU SUNSHINE. I^VE GIVEN YOU RAIN. HE SQUEEZES A FEW DROPS OF BLOOD FROM HIS FINGER INTO THE GAPING POD. IT SNATCHES FOR THE RED STUFF LIKE A PUPPY FOR A BISCUIT. SEYMOUR: I guess a few drops couldn't hurt... long as you don't make a habit out of it or anything. Audrey Two is alone now, lit by a shaft of moonlight pouring in through the basement window. As MUSIC BUILDS under, the dirt in which the plant is potted begins to stir. SEYMOUR: The dry surface erupts like a small earthquake. Roots begin to push through. The Maxwell House coffee can starts to shake, then bulge. At last, the plant itself begins to grow. CONTINUED: (3) 19 The pod sort of bubbles, then swells. SEYMOUR: New leaves appear, first as buds, and then unfurl before our eyes. The stem extends three inches, then four. By the time the MUSIC REACHES ITS CLIMAX, the plant is a sturdy f oot-and-a-half tall. It then bends its SteiTi gracefully and rises back up. SEYMOUR: If we didn't know better, we'd think it had just taken a curtain call. INT. RADIO STATION AN ANNOUNCER SITS AT A DESK IN A SMALL RADIO STATION. BE SPEAKS INTO A MICROPHONE. ANNOUNCER: This is radio station WSKID... HE PLAYS FIVE NOTES ON A SMALL CHIME. ANNOUNCER: Where in just a few minutes we'll be bringing you "Wink Wilkensen's Weird World!" The show that talks to wonderful people who bring in their weird things. But first, the news ... ... The President today announced . . . INT. CONTROL ROOM IT IS SEPARATED FROM THE STUDIO BY GLASS. WE FAINTLY HEAR THE NEWS BROADCAST AS WE SEE, SITTING IN A CHAIR, A MAN HOLDING A FISH WHICH IS STUFFED AND MOUNTED. THE PLANT IS NOW A GOOD TWELVE INCHES TALLER THAN WHEN WE SAW IT LAST. SEYMOUR WEARS TEN BAND-AIDS... ONLY WHEN THE PLANT HAS ITS POD OPEN AND IS ABOUT BITE THE ENGINEER, DOES SEYMOUR NOTICE. HE GRABS POD AND PULLS IT BACK. INT. THE STUDIO THE ANNOUNCER IS FINISHING THE NEWS. ANNOUNCER: . . . Partly cloudy on Saturday with highs in the mid-seventies. HE BANGS ON THE CHIME AGAIN , FIVE TIMES. ANNOUNCER: And now, "Hink Wilkensen' s Weird World!" with your host. Wink Wilkensen! Through the glass, in the background, we see an assistant get Seymour and the plant. MUSIC: THEME OF "WINK WILKENSEN' S WEIRD WORLD!" ANNOUNCER: Thanks, Ted. Ei, everybody. We've got a great show for you today. Some wonderful people with some really weird stuff, Our first guest is someone you've probably read about in the papers by now... Mr. ANNOUNCER: Seymour Krelborn who has discovered a new breed of plant life hitherto unknown on this planet. Hello, Mr. Krelborn. SEYMOUR: Uh, hello... Wink. ANNOUNCER: Say, I sure wish the folks at home could see this . Where did you get such a weird plant? CONTINUED: SEYMOUR: Well... you remember that total eclipse of the sun a couple of ' weeks ago? OMITTED INT. CONTROL ROOM CRYSTAL, RONETTE AND CHIFFON POP UP FROM BEHIND THE ENGINEER. GIRLS: Da Doo! INT. STUDIO SEYMOUR: I was walkin' in the wholesale flower district that day... INT. THE SHOP - EARLY EVENING THE CASH REGISTER RINGS. ITS DRAWER OPENS AS, FROM IT, MUSHNIK GRABS AND COUNTS WADS OF MONEY. ANNOUNCER: And thus we conclude our interview with Seymour Krelborn, the young botanical... er, do you mind if I call you a genius? SEYMOUR: Gosh, not Mushnik shakes his head in disbelief. ANNOUNCER: The genius who has discovered America's largest and most amazing unidentified plant. SEYMOUR: I'd like to remind our listeners that the Audrey Two is on display exclusively at Mushnik's Skid Row Florist's... DURING THE ABOVE. FROM INSIDE WE SEE THAT AUDREY IS OUTSIDE BANGING ON THE FRONT DOOR. AUDREY: Am I late? Did I miss it? THEY MOVE TO THE RADIO, ON WHICH WE HEAR SEYMOUR STRUG GLING TO GET HIS LAST WORDS IN AS THE ANNOUNCER CON CLUDES THE BROADCAST. SEYMOUR: That's Mushnik's... M... U*«* S««a X**« K... Open six days a week, ten to six! ANNOUNCER: And so until next Wednesday, this is Wink Wilkensen saying so long and watch out for what's weird. Mushnik switches OFF TEE RADIO. MUSHNIK: That's what I call advertising. HE GRABS HIS COAT AND STARTS OUT THE FRONT DOOR WITH AUDREY FOLLOWING. AUDREY: Seymour's first radio broadcast. I wanted to hear so bad. I tried to be on time, but... EXT. SHOP - EARLY EVENING MUSHNIK AND AUDREY ON SIDEWALK. MUSHNIK LOCKS THE DOOR. MUSHNIK: Don't tell me. You got tied up. AUDREY: No, just handcuffed... a little. WE SEE A LARGE PICTURE OF SEYMOUR AND THE PLANT HUNG NEAR THE SIGN IN THE DISPLAY WINDOW AS MUSHNIK WALKS AUDREY ACROSS THE STREET. CONTINUED: MOSHNIK: Handcuffed. Audrey, I don't know who this noodnick is you're hanging out with/ but he is hazardous to your health. AUDREY: That's. for sure. But I can't leave him. Why not? AUDREY: He'd get angry. And if he does this to me when he likes me, imagine what he'd do if he ever got mad. THEY ARRIVE AT HER TENEMENT DOOR. MUSHNIK SIGHS IN EXASPERATION AND LEAVES. MUSIC: LEAD-IN TO "SOMEWHERE THAT'S GREEN." INT. AUDREY'S APARTMENT - EARLY EVENING IT IS A TYPICAL, SMALL SKID ROW APARTMENT, HOWEVER, AUDREY HAS TRIED TO COVER THE POVERTY IN WHICH SHE LIVES BY DECORATING IT IN A STYLE WE WOULD CALL "FRILLY WOOLWORTH' S." SHE ENTERS AND LOOKS OUT HER WINDOW AT THE PICTURE OF SEYMOUR ACROSS THE STREET AS SHE SINGS: AUDREY: I think Seymour's the greatest But I'm dating a semi-sadist. So I got a black eye And my arm's in a cast. Still that Seymour's a cutie. SHE LOOKS AT HIS PICTURE AGAIN, THEN DECIDES TO BE HONEST. AUDREY: Well, if not He's got inner beauty And I dream of a place Where we could be together At last. . . SHE PULLS OUT HER TREASURED COLLECTION OF MAGAZINES: "HOUSE AND GARDENS," "BETTER HOMES," "WOMAN'S DAY." MUSIC SVIELLS LYRICALLY AS SHE FLIPS THEM OPEN TO FAVORITE PICTURES: MODEL KITCHENS WITH AVOCADO COLORED, DOUBLE-C. .R REFRIGERATORS, PLAYROOMS WITH KNOTTY PINE PANELLING, PRISTINE EARLY AMERICAN BEDROOMS WITH WHITE CHENILLE SPREADS AND DOILY-COVERED NIGHT TABLES. SHE SIGHS AND CONTINUES SINGING: AUDREY: A matchbox of our own. ■ A fence of real chain link A grill out on the patio Disposal in the sink A washer and a dryer and An ironing machine In a tract house that we share. Somewhere that's green. CAMERA PUSHES INTO THE PICTURE. AUDREY'S DAYDREAM SHE'S IN THE MAGAZINE PICTURES NOW, DRESSED FOR ALL THE WORLD TTKE BARBARA BILLINGSLEY FROM PUMPS TO PEARLS, A RUFFLED APRON PROTECTING HER SHIRTWAIST. SHE MOVES FROM ROOM TO ROOM OF A PERFECT (AND PERFECTLY AWFUL) SUBURBAN CHEESEBOX — DUSTING THE PLASTIC COVERED SOFA, ADJUSTING THE POLE-LAMPS, STRAIGHTENING THE HAND- TINTED, PI AS TIC- FRAMED PHOTOS — SINGING ALL THE WHILE. AUDREY: Be rakes and trims the grass Be loves to mow and weed I cook like Betty Crocker And I look like Donna Reed There's plastic on the furniture To keep it neat and clean In the Pine-Sol scented air Somewhere That's Green. ORCHESTRAL INTERLUDE - a brief dream ballet. THE MOOD NOW IS PURE LESLIE CARON AS THE REST OF AUDREY'S DREAM IS DANCED OUT. EXT. THE FRONT LAWN - DAY WE SEE A MERRILY POT-BELLIED SEYMOUR MOWING THE LAWN IN A BRIGHTLY COLORED BAN-LON SHIRT, AS A COCKER SPANIEL YAPS AT HIS HEELS. INT. THE PLAYROOM - DAY THE CHILDREN WATCH SATURDAY MORNING TV AS AUDREY APPEARS WITH A SMILING PITCHER OF KOOL-AID. THE DAUGHTER IS PLATINUM BLONDE LIKE HER MOM AND WEARS A LITTLE LEOPARD-PRINT PINAFORE. INT. THE DINING ROOM - DAY AUDREY USHERS NEIGHBOR LADIES IN PEDAL-PUSHERS AND CURLERS TO A TABLE SET FOR MAH JONGG. IN A FLASH, SHE'S BACK WITH BRIDGE-MIX AND CRUSTLESS TUNA FISH SANDWICHES. INT. THE LIVING ROOM - DAY AUDREY AND NEIGHBOR AT A TUPPERWARE PARTY. INT. THE KITCHEN - DAY AUDREY DANCES TO THE OVEN TO PUT IN FOUR SWANSON TV DINNERS. EXT. LONG SHOT - DUSK OUTSIDE, THE SUN BEGINS TO SET>OVER A DEVELOPMENT WHERE ALL THE HOUSES LOOK JUST LIKE THIS ONE. INT. PLAYROOM AT NIGHT AUDREY AND SEYMOUR SNUGGLE ON THE COUCH. THE KIDS ARE ON THE FLOOR, WATCHING LUCY WITH BER HAND STUCK IN A BOWLING BALL. AUDREY: Between our frozen dinner And our bedtime, nine-fifteen We snuggle watching Lucy On our big Enormous INT. UPSTAIRS AUDREY AND SEYMOUR TUCK THE KIDS INTO BUNK BEDS AND CHUCKLE AT THE PETS ASLEEP WITH THEM. AUDREY: I'm his December Bride Be's Father, He Knows Best The kids' room, next to our room And a third room for a guest A picture out of Better Eomes and Gardens Magazine Audrey and Seymour reach the threshold of their Early American bedroom. AUDREY: He lifts her up and we tactfully — DISSOLVE BACK TO: EXT. SKID ROW - NIGHT CLOSEUF OF AUDREY AT BER WINDOW SINGING. CAMERA SLOWLY PULLS BACK AS SHE LOOKS OUT AND SEES A BLEAK SKID ROW CITYSCAPE OF BRICK WALLS, GARBAGE, FIRE ESCAPES, AND PASSED-OUT WINOS. AUDREY: Far from Skid Row I dream we ' 11 go Somewhere That's... Green. CAMERA HAS PULLED BACK ACROSS THE STREET SO WE SEE AN EXTREME WIDE SHOT OF AUDREY'S TENEMENT. EERS IS THE ONLY BRIGHT LIGHT WE SEE IN THIS DARK, DECAYED STREET. MUSIC:- A PULSING, HIGH ENERGY, BASS LINE. THE BEGINNING OF *SOME PUN NOW." THIS MUSIC DISSOLVES THE REFLECTIVE MOOD AS CAMERA TILTS UP TO SEE THE SKID ROW SKYLINE. ON A DISTANT "ROOFTOP ARE THREE FIGURES, SILHOUETTED AGAINST THE SKY. CRYSTAL, RONETTE AND CHIFFON, IN A GIRL-GROUP FORMATION, BATHED IN THE GLOW OF A ROOFTOP NEON SIGN. THEY BEGIN TO SING. GIRLS: Ya YaYaYa Ya Ya Ya Ya YaYaYa Ya Ya Ya GIRLS: Seymour, the shnook. His life was the worst Oh what a bore dirt poor is Now take a look His- "I ]ck has reversed Joy to the boy I It sure is Some fun now! GIRLS: INSERT - SPINNING NEWSPAPER - "Skid Row Gazette." HEADLINE — "Mystery Plant at Mushnik'sl" INSERT - SPINNING NEWSPAPER - "Garden Club News." HEADLINE — "Audrey Two! The New Plant for the Sixties?!" Photo of a larger Audrey Two being held by a weaker-looking Seymour. GIRLS: INSERT - SPINNING PERIODICAL - "The Second Annual Horticultural Awards Luncheon." Several photos of Seymour holding the plant and accepting an award. GIRLS: He was bringin' up the rear-o He was ringin' .up a zero Now he's swingin' into gear-o Some fun now Now TELEVISION APPEARANCE: Seymour, holding an ever-larger Audrey Two talks with Grouehe Marx on "Vou Bet Your Life." The duck flies down. The secret word is " chlorophyl . " GIRLS: Some fun now Most folks used to sock it to him Told jokes, used to try to screw him Now they're proud to say they knew him Some fun now INSERT - SPINNING "TV GUIDE." "TV Guide" stops spinning, opens and CAMERA pushes in to see listing for "Mr. GIRLS: Wizard." TELEVISION APPEARANCE - Seymour, holding an even larger Audrey Two, talks to Mr. Wizard and a couple of thirteen-year-old kids who look too smart for their own good. GIRLS: Some fun now That's the way the Whoople goes And That's the way the garden grows And Some fun heaven only knows It's... STILL PHOTOS - Various stills of Seymour being more successful. GIRLS: Some fun now! Some fun nowl Some fun now! Some fun nowl INT. SHOP - DAY THE SHOP IS BULGING WITH CUSTOMERS ALL CHATTERING ABOUT, AND VIEWING, THE AUDREY TWO AND BUYING FLOWERS AS IF THEY WERE GOING OUT OF STYLE. IT IS OBVIOUS THAT MUSHNIK HAS PLOUGHED SOME OF HIS PROFITS BACK INTO THE SHOP. CONTINUE SINGING "SOME PWN NOW," THE LYRLCS OF WHICH FADE INTO AND MINGLE WITH THE CACOPHONY OF THE PEOPLE IN THE STORE. GIRLS: Some fun nowl Some fun nowl Sane fun now. Some fun now. AS THE THRONG MOVES ABOUT THE SHOP THEY CLEAR THE PLANT ENOUGH FOR US TO SEE THAT IT IS NOW SITTING IN AN ENORMOUS POT ON THE FLOOR AND STANDING A FULL FOUR-FEET TALL WITH A SPOTLIGHT ON IT. MUSHNIK IS ON THE PHONE AND CAN BARELY MAKE HIMSELF HEARD OVER ALL THE BABBLE. MUSHNIK: Yes, Mrs. Shiva. No, Mrs. Shiva. Right away, Mrs. Shiva, Seymour! Did you send out the order for Mrs. Shiva? CONTINUED: SEYMOUR: Mrs. Shival I forgotl MUSHNIK: You forgoti You forgot! Do yc hear this, God? Are you listeni-ng, customers? He forgot! Seymour heads for the storeroom. 4 0 INT. STOREROOM - DAY 40 The shop's little storage room has been converted into a flower arranging area. MUSHNIK: Audrey is hard at work on a "Get Well Soon" arrangement which includes not only flowers but handy pocket packs of Kleenex and bottles of aspirin. Behind her a sign advertises "Arrangements by Audrey." From the other room, we hear the bustling SOUNDS of the successful shop. MUSHNIK: Seymour rushes in just as Audrey puts the final touch into her arrangement... a thermometer. SEYMOUR: Audrey, quick... we gotta do an emergency arrangement. AUDREY: Birthday? Wedding? Baby? SEYMOUR: Funeral.. AUDREY: Hand me the lilies. THEY CLEAR A SPACE ON THE TABLE AND AUDREY BEGINS TO ASSEMBLE A VERY LARGE AND SCRUPULOUSLY TASTELESS FUNERAL ARRANGEMENT. HUGE LILIES. SEYMOUR: Mr. Mushnik's really mad. I keep forgetting things. I guess it's 'cause I feel a little weak and lightheaded all the time.. AUDREY: Scissors. You've got a lot on your mind. Mushnik passes through on the way to the basement. MUSHNIK: Mind? What mind? The Shivas are our most important funereal account. Who could forget such an order? HE LEAVES. AUDREY: Sometimes I think Mr. Mushnik* s too hard on you. Glue. Seymour hands Audrey a can of spray glue with which she begins to spray the fresh lilies, carnations and mums in her arrangement. Neither she nor Seymour considers this anything out of the ordinary. SEYMOUR: I don't mind. After all, I owe him everything. He took me out of the Skid Row Borne for Boys when I was just a little tyke... gave me a warm place to sleep. . . under the counter... good things to eat like meatloaf and water... Floors to sweep and toilets to clean and... AUDREY: Glitter. SHE IS HOLDING OUT HER HAND LIKE A SURGEON DOES FOR A SCALPEL. SEYMOUR HANDS HER A PLASTIC BAG OF MULTI COLORED GLITTER. AUDREY: You know, I think you should raise your expectations, Seymour. Now that you're getting successful I mean. SHE PAUSES FOR A MOMENT AND LOOKS STRAIGHT AT HIM. AUDREY: It's clear you suffer from a low self-image. And it's high time you should get it fixed. Go out and do something nice for yourself, like buy some nice clothes. COMTINDED: (2) SEYMOUH: Aw, I'm a very bad shopper, Audrey. I don't have good taste., , HE LOOKS ADMIRINGLY DOWN AT THE GLITTERING ARRANGEMENT, THEN ADORINGLY UP INTO HER EYES. SEYMOUR: ... like you. AUDREY: Oh... Well... ... I could help you pick things out. HE CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT HE'S JUST HEARD, FIE LEANS CLOSER. SEYMOUR: You could? So does she. AUDREY: Surel And closer... SEYMOUR: You'd go shopping with me? AUDREY: Sure! And closer... SEYMOUR: You'd be seen with me in a public place like a department store? AUDREY: Surel SEYMOUR: Tonight? CONTINUED! (3) Reality intrudes. She pulls back, embarrassed and upset. She smiles shyly to cover it. Mushnik now re- enters, having come from the basement. AUDREY: Oh, I can't tonight. ... I've got a date. Seymour is crestfallen. Seeing Mushnik, he grabs the arrangement and exits. Audrey watches Seymour as he dejectedly walks away. She truly wishes she could go out with him. MUSHNIK: Again this date? Some date. A date gives you a corsage, not a multiple fracture, I'm telling you, Audrey, he ain't a good, clean kinda boy. AUDREY: He's a professional. MUSHNIK: What kinda professional drives a motorcycle and wears a black leather jacket? MUSIC: A JIASTY, TAMBOURINE AND CHAIN- FLAVORED "LEADER OF THE PACK" MUSICAL VAMP BEGINS AS WE — CUT TO; EXT. STREET - DAY EXTREME CLOSEUP OF A BLACK- LEATHERED GLOVE REVVING THE ACCELERATOR OF A MOVING MOTORCYCLE. CAMERA TILTS UP TO SEE A FACE COVERED BY A BLACK MOTORCYCLE HELMET. ORIN: When I was younger, just a bad little kid My mama noticed funny things I did Like shootin' puppies with a B.B. gun I'd poison guppies, and when I was done — I'd find a pussycat and bash in his head. That's when my Mama said... EXT. CITY STREET SCENE - DAY PEDESTRIANS BUSILY MOVING ALONG THE SIDEWALK. CRYSTAL, RONETTE AND CHIFFON .ARE SITTING ON A PARKED CAR AS ORIN PULLS UP. GIRLS: What did she say? Orin gets off the bike, which miraculously stays up by itself. He walks into an office building and down a corridor. SHE SAID, MY BOY I THINK SOMEDAY YOU'LL FIND A WAY TO MAKE YOUR NATURAL TENDENCIES PAY. HE STOPS IN THE CORRIDOR AND OPENS A DOOR. ORIN (CENT.) YOU'LL BE A ... INT. DENTIST'S OFFICE ORIN STEPS INSIDE AND UNZIPS HIS BLACK LEATHER JACKET UNDERNEATH WHICH HE IS WEARING A WHITE DENTIST'S UNIFORM. THE' GIRLS ARE NOW IN THE BACKGROUND WEARING DENTAL ASSISTANT'S UNIFORMS AND SINGING BACK-UP. ORIN: Dentist! You have a talent for causing things pain. Orin takes off his helmet and flings it aside, hitting his nurse. Hiss Mack, and knocking her out. ORIN: Son be a Dentistl People will pay you to be inhumane. ROOM ONE: Orin enters. A terrified patient, wearing God-awful looking braces, is in the chair. Orin, still wearing his motorcycle gloves, grabs an absolutely filthy, crud-caked towel and "cleans" his gloves. GRIN: Your temperment's wrong for the priesthood And teaching would suit you still less. CONTINUED : 44 Orin grabs a large pliers from a cabinet full of horrific-looking .dental instruments. He wrenches the patient's head back and maniacally "tightens" the patient's braces. GRIN: Orin twists the braces with the same subtlety he would use to jack up a car. The patient almost passes out. ORIN: Son, be a Dentist You'll be a success! Orin exits. MUSIC VAMPS. ROOM TWO 45 Grinning dementedly, he enters the room as a star would enter a stage. A twelve-year -old boy sits in the chair. His mother stands next to him, holding his hand. GIRLS: Here he is, folks The leader of the plague Orin yanks the gas mask off the terrified boy and he breathes in some gas. GIRLS: Watch him suck up that gasl Oh my Godl The mother faints. High on nitrous oxide, Orin giggles maniacally and exits. ROOM THREE 46 Orin enters giggling. GIRLS: He's a dentist and he'll never-ever be Any good. Another horrified PATIENT trembles in the chair as Orin goes into the Patient's mouth with a rusty pliers. Orin emerges with a large rotted tooth, roots and all. He flings the tooth aside and exits giggling. CONTINUED: 4 GIRLS: Who wants their teeth done By the Marquis De SadeJ MUSIC VAMPS. ROOM FOUR ORIN IS LEANING OVER ANOTHER PATIENT TO WHOM HE'S JUST GIVEN AN INJECTION. ORIN RETRACTS THE- HUGE NEEDLE FROM THE PATIENT'S MOUTH. PATIENT: Oh, that hurts! Orin grabs his trusty pliers and heads for the Patient's teeth. PATIENT (cent.) Wait ! I'm not numb ! GRIN: Ah, shut up! Open wide! Here I come! REVERSE SHOT from inside the Patient's mouth. We see the back of his teeth, tongue, and lips and through the opening of the lips we see Orin and the Girls singing. ORIN: I am your Dentist! PATIENT: Goodness gracious! ORIN: And I enjoy the career that I picked. GIRLS: You love it! ORIN: I am your Dentist CUT TO OR IN AT THE DOOR. IT IS CLOSED. GIRLS: Fitting bracesl Or in stands with his ear to the door, listening. ORIN: And I get off on the pain I inflict! ON THE WORD' "INFLICT" ORIN VIOLENTLY SWINGS OPEN THE DOOR. TEE HALLWAY WE SEE ORIN HAS CAUGHT HIS NURSE, MISS MACK, IN MID STRIDE AND HAS FLATTENED HER AGAINST THE WALL. LOVING ITR HE CROSSES TO ROOM FIVE. GIRLS: He really loves it! ROOM FIVE: Orin is hand cranking a WWII field DRILL which emits a horrible SCREECHING NOISE. The Patient is absolutely catatonic with fear as, ever grinning, Orin gets down to it. ORIN: I thrill when I drill A bicuspid It's swell, though they tell me I'm maladjusted GIRLS: Dentist! WAITING ROOM Orin pokes his smiling head in. ORIU: And though it may cause my patients distress. All the Patients in the waiting room cower back. PATIENTS: Distress! ROOM FIVE: A PATIENT who is manacled hand and foot and whose mouth is filled with cotton bits, fights to remove herself from the chair/ The Girls hold her down. Grin relishes making her wait for the torment to come. ROOM FIVE: He opens a cupboard and inside we see an altar with candles burning and a large, gilt-framed photo of an elderly Italian lady. Be sings to it adoringly. ORIN: Somewhere, Somewhere in heaven above me I know — I know that my mama's proud of me 'Cause I'm a Dentist! And a success 1 HE SLOWLY, MENACINGLY STARTS TO APPROACH THE PATIENT BRANDISHING A WHINING DRILL IN ONE HAND AND WITH THE OTHER HAND HE HOLDS A WATER SPRAYER. HE VICIOUSLY SPRAYS A THICK, STEADY STREAM OF WATER INTO THE PATIENT'S MOUTH. ORIN: Say ah. PATIENT: Ahhh. . . ORIN: Say ahl PATIENT: Aggggghhhh! Orin is leering, menacing, and wild-eyed as he's drown- ing the Patient. ORIN: _ Say ah ! PATIENT: Ahhhrrgggrr! ORIN: Now spit. CONTINUED: ORIN VIOLENTLY SLAPS THE PATIENT ON THE BACK. THE PATIENT HEAVES FORWARD SPEWING OUT A HUGE MOUTHFUL OF WATER AND COTTON BITS AS WE — 51A EXT. STREET 51A A CLOSEUP OF ABOUT A GALLON OF WATER AND PIECES OF GRAVEL LANDING IN THE GUTTER. CAMERA TILTS UP TO SEE A LARGE VASE OF WATER BEING EMPTIED BY SEYMOUR. SEYMOUR: I'm sorry, sir. You can't go in there now. ORIN: Oh yes, I can. SEYMOUR: No, really, sir. We're dosedl ORIN: Relax. You want some nitrous oxide? SEYMOUR: No, no, thank you. ORIN: Suit yourself. SEYMOUR: Uh... sir... You really can't... Audrey comes out of the shop, dressed for her date. AUDREY: It's okay, Seymour. This is my date. . . 51A CONTINUED: 51A Orin nods, grins, and giggles inanely, feeling the gas. AUDREY: My boyfriend. Seymour. Orin • Scr ivello. . . Orin abruptly stops laughing and shoots her a murderous glare. AUDREY: D.D.S. Hev l Sir? ORIN: I know you. Sure, I saw you on the news... Gimme a minute, now. I know your name... it's Cedric, Steven, Simon. . . AUDREY: Seymour. . . ORIN: Somebody talkin' to you? AUDREY: Oh no... Excuse me. ORIN: Excuse me what? AUDREY: Excuse me... Doctor. ORIN: That's better. I know, you're the Plant Guy, right? Hey, wait l It must be in there, huh? 51A CONTINUED: (2) 51A HE INHALES SOME MORE NITROUS AND STUMBLES TO THE WINDOW. THERE VT IS, BIG AS LIFE. ORIN: Ow wow, is that incredible! AUDREY: Er... shouldn't we be leaving now? Or in shoots her another threatening look. AUDREY: I'm sorry! ORIN: Sorry what? AUDREY: Doctor! Doctor! Sorry, Doctor! ORIN: Ya gotta train 'em, eh, stud? Listen, here's my card. You ever need a root canal or anything just give me a buzz, you hear? I'm serious. It's on the bouse, okay, Aud-ree! Orin tosses his head summoning Audrey to follow. ORIN: She sneaks one miserable, trapped glance at Seymour, then forces herself to join Orin on the motorcycle. As Orin REVS it up we see, on the cycle, a decal insignia of a tooth stuck with a dagger and the letters. "A.D.A." Orin calls back to Audrey over the ROAR OF THE ENGINE. ORIN: You got the handcuffs? AUDREY: They're right in my bag. Seymour's blood is boiling. He leaps on his bicycle and pedals off to follow them. EXT. DRIVE-IN - NIGHT ORIN, ASTRIDE HIS BIKE GLEEFULLY WATCHES THE START OF "CREATURE FROM THE HAUNTED SEA." AUDREY, BEHIND HIM ON THE BIKE (WHERE SHE COULDN'T SEE THE SCREEN IF SHE WANTED TO) , IS FORCED TO SIT HOLDING THE LITTLE DRIVE IN SPEAKER. EXT. THE DRIVE-IN'S SNACK BAR WITH A TACKY NEON SIGN IN THE BACKGROUND AND A WOMAN IN ROBE AND CURLERS CARRYING FOOD IN THE FOREGROUND, SEYMOUR, DEPRESSED TO THE POINT OF DESPERATION, SITS AT A PICNIC TABLE WATCHING THEM. THUNDER. A SUDDEN CLOUDBURST. EXT. DRIVE-IN ON THE MOTORCYCLE, ORIN SNAPS HIS FINGERS. AUDREY PULLS OUT AN UMBRELLA AND HOLDS IT IN ONE HAND, THE SPEAKER STILL IN THE OTHER, COVERING ORIN WHILE SHE HERSELF GETS SOAKED. EXT. SNACK BAR SEYMOUR, DEJECTED AND GETTING WET, BICYCLES AWAY. INT. THE SHOP - NIGHT (AN HOUR LATER) SEYMOUR, MISERABLE AND WET FROM HIS RIDE, SITS ON THE FLOOR NEXT TO AUDREY TWO. HE. SEYMOUR: You oughta see the way he treats her Twoey. She deserves a prince, not a sadistic creep like him. The man's a total disgrace to the dental profession. I don't know what's goin' on sometimes. Seems like the whole world's goin' crazy. Least we got each other, right? SEYMOUR: I'm gonna turn in, Twoey. See ya in the. . . Seymour starts for the basement when he hears a CRUNCH- ING SOUND. He turns around and sees that — Audrey Two has wilted dramatically. SEYMOUR: Oh boy, here we go again. HE LOOKS DOWN AT HIS FINGERS. THERE'S STILL A BANDAGE ON EACH ONE. SEYMOUR (EONT.) C'INON, I HAVEN'T GOT MUCH LEFT. I'M ALL ANEMIC R I'VE GOT DIZZY SPELLS... THE PLANT SPEAKS. A DEEP, FUNKY BASSO. AUDREY TWO: Feed me. SEYMOUR: I beg your pardon? AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: Twoey... you talked... you opened your trap, your.- thing and you said... AUDREY TWO: Feed me, Rrelbornl Feed me now 1 Seymour frantically starts removing a band-aid and starting toward the Plant. SEYMOUR: Look, maybe I can squeeze a little more out of this one, but Seymour stands over the gaping pod, trying to squeeze drop or two from his bone-dry finger.- AUDREY TWO: More! More! SEYMOUR: There isn't any more! Whatdya want me to do? Slit my wrists? Silently the Plant opens its pod as if to say "You got it!" SEYMOUR: Oh boy. Look... I got an idea... CONTINTJED: (2) SEYMOUR: I'm- a- go down to S hmendr i k ' s and pick you up some nice chopped sirloin. AUDREY TWO: Must be blood. SEYMOUR: Twoeyr .that's disgusting. AUDREY TWO: Must be fresh. SEYMOUR: I don't want to hear this. MUSIC IN. "GIT IT." THE PLANT STARTS TO SING. AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: Does it have to be human? AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: Does it have to be mine? AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: Where am 1 s' posed to get it? THE PLANT GOES INTO A "ROCK ME, BABY" STYLE BLUES RIFF, SWAYING ITS LEAVES AND MOVING ITS POD WITH SLICK IN SINUATION. AUDREY TWO: Feed me, Seymour. Feed me all night long That's right, boy, you can do itl Feed me, Seymo-ur Feed me, all night long. AUDREY TWO: Henh, henh, henh, henh! 'Cause if ya feed me, Seymour, I can grov* rp, big and strong 1 Seymour starts for the storeroom. He's seen enough. SEYMOTO: You eat blood, Audrey Two, let's face it. How'm I s'.posed to keep on feeding you, kill people? AUDREY TWO: I'll make it worth your while. Seymour stops dead in his tracks. SEYMOUR: What? AUDREY TWO: You think this is all coincidence, baby? The sudden success around here? The press coverage? SEYMOUR: Look, you're a plant 1 An inanimate object 1 Seymour heads out again. The Plant sends a vine flying out across the room and wraps it around Seymour's waist. AUDREY TWO: Does this look inanimate to you, punk? ... If I can talk and I can move? Who's to say I can't do anything I want? SEYMOUR: Like what? AUDREY TWO: Like deliver, pal. Like see you get everything your secret, greasy heart desires! The SONG resumes as the Plant sensually rubs its vine up and down Seymour's side. AUDREY TWO (cont. ) Would you like a Cadillac car? Or a guest shot on Jack Paar? AUDREY TWO: How about a date with Hedy Lamarr? You gonna git it? The Plant's vine spins Seymour around abruptly so he's now facing the singing pod. It begins to rock in time to its own music.-' AUDREY TWO (COnt. AUDREY TWO: ) Mm hm* How'd ya like to be a big wheel Dinin' out for every meal I'm the plant who can make it real! You gonna git it! THE PLANT STARTS MOVING ITS VINES AND TENDRILS LIKE AN OCTOPUS AT A MODERN DANCE RECITAL AS THE MUSIC TURNS FUNKY, SLOW, AND HOT. AUDREY TWO (CONT. ) I'M YOUR GENIE I'M YOUR FRIEND I'M YOUR WILLING SLAVE TAKE A CHANCE. JUST FEED ME AND YA KNOW THE KINDA EATS THE KINDA RED HOT TREATS THE KINDA STICKY, LICKY SWEETS I CRAAAAAAAVEL ON THAT WORD "CRAVE , " THE PLANT OPENS ITS POD WIDE FOR THE FIRST TIME, GIVING US A GLIMPSE OF FEROCIOUS TEETH INSIDE. ONE VINE PULLS UP A CHAIR WHILE TWO OTHER VINES PUSH SEYMOUR DOWN ONTO THE CHAIR. THE POD RISES UP A BIT NOW, SO IT'S TOWERING OVER THE SEATED SEYMOUR LIKE THE GENIE FROM THE LAMP. THE STEM ON WHICH IT RESTS ROCKS OUT AS THE SONG STARTS GOING FOR BROKE. AUDREY TWO (CONT. ) " C'MON, SEYMOUR DON'T BE A PUTZ TRUST ME AND YOUR LIFE' 11 SURELY RIVAL KING TUT' S SHOW A LITTLE 'NITIATIVE WORK UP THE GUTS AND YOU'LL GIT ITL SEYMOUR STANDS AND, DURING THE FOLLOWING LYRICS WHICH SEYMOUR SINGS TO HIMSELF IN VOICE OVER, HE LOOKS IN A MIRROR AND SEES... INSTEAD OF HIS OWN FACE... SEYMOUR ' (V.O.) I DON' T KNOWL I DON ' T KNOW 1 I HAVE SO MANY STRONG RESERVATIONS! SHOULD I GO AND PERFORM. . SEYMOUR TURNS AWAY FROM THE GRINNING BUM AND SEES A PAIR OF SCISSORS ON THE COUNTER NEXT TO SOME SHINY RED RIBBON. SEYMOUR (CENT.) . . SEYMOUR, STILL LOST IN THOUGHT. THE PLANT OVER HIS SHOULDER, LEANING CLOSER. AUDREY TWO: You didn't have nothin' till you met me. C'mon, kid. What' 11 it be? Money? Girls? One particular girl? How *bout that Audrey? Think it over. There must be someone you could eight- six, real quiet like... AUDREY TWO: and git me some LUNCH 1 The Plant rocks out again, moving its stem like Mick Jagger moves his hips, leaning its pod over one of its vines, almost as if the leaf held a microphone. AUDREY TWO: Think about that room at the Ritz! Wrapped in velvet, covered in glitz! A little nookie gonna clean up those zitsl And you'll Git Itl Seymour turns away from the doorway and sings to him- self. SEYMOUR: Gee, I'd like a Harley machine... AUDREY TWO: Now you're cookin' I SEYMOUR: Toolin' around like I was James Dean... AUDREY TWO: Yeah! . SEYMOUR: Makin' all the guys on the corner Turn green! AUDREY TWO: So Go Git It! Ooooh- oooh- oooh- oooh Seymour gets into it, now, as the Plant moves every- thing it's got ~ pod, vines, stem, leaves. It's actu- ally dancing with Seymour who bugaloos right back at it. AUDREY TWO: If you wanna be profound And you really gotta justify Take a break and look around A lotta folks deserve to die ! THE FUN STOPS. SEYMOUR CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT HE JUST HEARD. SEYMOUR: Wait a minute, wait a minute! That's not a very nice thing to say. AUDREY TWO: But it's true, isn't it? SEYMOUR: No! I don't know anyone who deserves to get chopped up and fed to a hungry plant! AUDREY TWO: Mininm, sure you do. And with that, the Plant sends a vine sailing across the room to a light switch, which it flicks off with the greatest of ease. CONTINUED: (7) 56 From the darkened shop's front window, the street out- side is now plainly visible. AUDREY TWO: The Plant's vines take Seymour firmly by the shoulders and point him toward the window. EXT. THE STREET OUTSIDE - SEYMOUR'S POV IT'S STILL RAINING LIGHTLY. GRIN'S MOTORCYCLE ROARS TO A HALT OUTSIDE AUDREY'S TENEMENT BUILDING. THEY "DISEMBARK." ORIN: Stupid woman! Christ, what a friggin' scatterbrainl AUDREY: I'm sorry, Doctor 1 I'm sorry. Doctor I ORIN: Drops the damned umbrella, gets me soaked I AUDREY: I'm clumsy. Doctor! I'm clumsy, Doctor ! THEY DISAPPEAR INTO AUDREY'S BUILDING, BUT THEIR MUFFLED VOICES ARE STILL AUDIBLE. ORIN: Get the door open, ya little slut. AUDREY: I'm trying. Doctor! I'm trying. Doctor 1 THEY APPEAR NOW AS SILHOUETTES ON THE CLOSED SHADE OF AUDREY'S APARTMENT WINDOW. ORIN: Look at my jacket! Look at my hair! Get the Vitalisl Quick, the Vi talis! AUDREY: I'm out of it. Doctor! ORIN: What? !? !? I? Still in silhouette on the shade, he slaps her . CONTINUED: 57 AUDREY: Orinl That hurt! ORIN: Can itl INT. THE SHOP MUSIC BUILDS TO A CLIMAX AS SEYMOUR SLOWLY TURNS, RED FACED AND TREMBLING, TOWARD THE PLANT. HE'S A MAN POSSESSED NOW — READY TO DO ANYTHING TO SAVE AUDREY FROM THE CLUTCHES OF THAT BEAST ACROSS THE STREET. SEYMOUR & AUDREY TWO: If you want a rationale It isn't very hard to see Stop and think it over^ pal, The guy sure looks like plantfood to me J The guy sure looks like plantfood to me! The guy sure looks like plantfpod to me! SEYMOUR & AUDREY TWO: , The Plant, jumping up and down ~ its pot hammering the floorboards — is singing and "dancing" wildly now, shaking everything it' s got working Seymour up to a frenzy. SEYMOUR: He's so nasty, treating her rough! AUDREY TWO: Smackin* her around and always talkin' so tough! SEYMOUR: You need blood, and he's got more than enough! AUDREY TWO: I need blood, and he's got more than enough! SEYMOUR & AUDREY TWO: You (I) need blood and he's got more than enough! The Plant's pod looks Seymour straight in the eye... AUDREY TWO • So go Git It l COHTINDED: Seymour turns away from the Plant and into a OuOSEUP his face a knot of utter resolve. INT. DENTIST'S OFFICE RECEPTION ROOM - 6 P.M. (THE NEXT AFTERNOON) MISS MACK, A RECEPTIONIST AND REFUGEE FROM THE WOMEN'S ARMY CORPS, SITS READING "COMBAT MAGAZINE." SHE HAS A LARGE BAND-AID ON HER FACE FROM WHEN THE HELMET HIT HER. ACROSS FROM HER WAITS A PATIENT, MR. GRIN'S GIGGLES WAFT IN FROM A -NEARBY EXAMINING ROOM. THEY ARE FOLLOWED BY A SCREAM OF PAIN. MISS MACK: Weakling. DENTON: Does that mean they're finished? Is it almost my turn? MISS MACK: Keep your pants on. A TEENAGED GIRL emerges from the examining room. Her mouth is encumbered by a grotesquely exaggerated ver- sion of a night-retainer so large, heavy, and rusted, the Girl can barely hold her head up. MISS MACK: Ber MOTHER, deeply shaken by the dentistry she has just witnessed, mumbles to herself in shock. THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD, I SHALL NOT WANT. . DENTON APPROACHES THE TEENAGER. DENTON: What did he do? Tell me everything! TEENAGER: Argf luuggggshjenkrenh! The Mother and Daughter exit. Denton sits down. Miss Mack glances at the clock and starts to pack it in for the evening. CONTINUED: 59 Orin enters wearing a leather apron. He smiles madly; his eyes are glazed. ORIN: Next! Denton springs to his feet. DENTON: That's -me I Arthur Denton! I*m next! ORIN: Does that have an appointment? MISS MACK: Ask it, I'm off duty. SHE LEAVES. DENTON CHATTERS AWAY EXCITEDLY AS HE AND ORIN HEAD FOR THE OFFICE. ■ DENTON YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN SAVING UP ALL MONTH FOR THIS. I'M SURE I NEED A ROOT CANAL. ORIN: We'll see. DENTON: I have a history of dental illness. ORIN: Shut upl DENTON: Yes, sir! INT. ORIN'S 0FFIC3: ORIN, TAKING A HIT FROM HIS SMALL NITROUS OXIDE VIAL, COMES TOWARD DENTON BRANDISHING A DRILL. DENTON: Yes! Yes! That's it! Show it to me first! Show it to me first! Orin starts into his mouth. INT. RECEPTION ROOM SEYMOUR OPENS THE DOOR AND LOOKS AROUND. NOBODY THERE. DENTON: That was terrific! More! LOUDER DRILLING O.S. DENTON (O.S.) (COnt.) Don't stop! Oh, God, don't stop now! Seymour winces. INT. OFFICE DENTON IS IN A FRENZY. ORIN, HAVING PAUSED IN HIS WORK FOR A MOMENT, STARES AT HIM IN DISBELIEF. DENTON: Morel Yesi Yesl Yesl I want itl Now! Now! Now! Yesl What's wrong? ORIN: Get out. DENTON: Aw, come on. Doc. ORIN: I said, get outi Denton comes running out of the office, Orin following close behind, carrying his drill. ORIN ,(cont.) Goddamn sickol Move itl Denton is out the door in a flash. Orin, frenzied, whirls on Seymour, catching him off guard. ORIN: Lemme ask you something. Does this scare you? SEYMOUR: Yeah. ORIN: Would you like it if I took this thing and made straight for your goddamn incisors?! SEYMOUR: Nol ORIN: It'd hurt, right? SEYMOUR: Rightl ORIN: You'd scream, right? SEYMOUR: Rightl ORIN: Then get your ass in herel SEYMOUR: What? ! Before Seymour can do anything, Orin has started haul- ing him into the office. INT. OFFICE SEYRNOUR STRUGGLES, BUT ORIN EASILY STRAPS HIM INTO THE CHAIR AND SHINES THE LIGHT RIGHT IN SEYMOUR'S EYES. ORIN: Don' t I know you? SEYMOUR: Seymour Krelborn, we met yester... Orin forces Seymour's mouth wide open and looks in gleefully. ORIN: Oo, your mouth's a mess, kid. Let's start with that wisdom tooth I Orin gets his pliers. SEYMOUR: No! ORIN: We'll just rip the little bugger right outa there, whatdya say? SEYMOUR: Let me -:go! Grin turns to Seymour, suddenly smiling. ORIN: There's always time for dental hygiene, Seymour. You ever seen the results of a neglected mouth? Look, Seymour! With a flick of his finger, Orin turns on a light box, similar to those used to read X-rays. ORIN: This one, how- ever, displays an enormous color slide of a disgusting, rotted, decaying, salivating dog's mouth. . ORIN (cont.) This could happen to youl Seymour is about to be ill. ORIN: Unless I take immediate action. Orin grabs his WWII field DRILL and starts to pump the drill's pedal. It makes a high-pitched, HORRIBLE SOUND. SEYMOUR: What's that? ORIN: That's the drill, Seymour. SEYMOUR: It's rustyl ORIN: It's an antique! THEY DON'T MAKE INSTRUMENTS LIKE THIS ANY MORE. STURDY, HEAVY, DULL. HE IS ABOUT TO DRILL SEYMOUR WHEN HE GETS AN IDEA AND STOPS ABRUPTLY. ORIN: I'm gonna want some gas for this one. SEYMOUR: Gas? ORIN: Nitrous oxide. SEYMOUR: Oh, thank God. I thought you weren't going to use any. ORIN: Oh, the gas isn't for you, Seymour. It's for me. I wanna really enjoy this. In fact, I'm gonna use my special gas mask. As Orin speaks, he opens the cabinet and pulls out an elaborate mask. He straps it on around his neck, he is preoccupied enough not to notice... ORIN: Seymour loosening his wrist restraints. ORIN: I find that a little giggle gas before we begin increases my pleasure enormously. The mask in place now, Orin turns the knob on the wall all the way up to Full . ORIN (cent.) Here we go! HISSING SOUNDS. Orin immediately begins to get high and giggle. HE IS LAUGHING SO HARD NOW, HE HAS TO HOLD ONTO A COUNTERTOP FOR SUPPORT. THIS TURNS HIS BACK TOWARD S EYMOUR . ORIN: Oh boy, Seymour, I am flyin' now. . Oh, the things we are gonna do to your mouth 1 Eeeeeyaaaahahahahahal Orin tries to regain composure and straighten up. ORIN: Okay, okay, okay, okay. Work to do. ORIN: Time to work. Okay, okay, straighten up and.*. HE SOMEHOW MANAGES TO PULL HIMSELF TO AN UPRIGHT POSI TION AND TURNS AROUND. SUDDENLY, HIS EXPRESSION IS ONE OF SHOCK AS HE SEES... SEYMOUR, STANDING IN THE DOORWAY, POINTING A GUN AT HIM. ORIN: What the hell is that? Seymour closes his eyes and clenches his teeth, trying to make himself shoot. ORIN: A gun. The kid's got a goddajnn revolver! Jesus, I'm in trouble, huh? HE GIGGLES HYSTERICALLY AS HE TURNS THE GAS KNOB. IT COMES OFF IN HIS HAND. THE EISSZNG SOUND CONTINUES. ORIN: Dh oh. . . Laughs. Seymour keeps the gun pointed, trying to force himself to actually pull the trigger. Orin makes an attempt to get the mask off, but he can barely get his arms up to his head. Ee's too weak from the gas and the laughter. ORIN: Oh boy... uh... Dh... Seymour, give me a hand, would ya? Er... no, I guess you wouldn't. HE LAUGHS. HE TRIES TO PULL THE HOSE OUT OF THE WALL. CONTINUED: (4) 63 ORIN FINDS THIS HILARIOUS. HE'S ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING LIKE AN IMBECILE, WHEEZING, AND DESPERATELY TRYING TO CATCH HIS BREATH. ORIN: The point is, Seymour, I could asphyx . . . asphyx . . . asphyx . . . Help me I ! ! Seymour just stands there watching, gun still pointed. ORIN: What'd I ever do to you? SEYMOUR: Nothin' ... It's what you did to her. Orin stares Seymour in the face. HER WHO? BEAT. HE GETS IT. ORIN: Oh. ... Her. Orin loses consciousness. His head, still encased in the mask, hits the floor WITH A THUD. He' s dead. Seymour slowly lowers the unused gun to bis side. MUSIC: STURM AND DRANG. A FULL ORCHESTRAL "LITTLE SHOP" IN A MINOR KEY. EXT. A DARK ALLEY - NIGHT SEYMOUR IS SLOWLY AND LABORIOUSLY DRAGGING A VERY LARGE AND HEAVY WHITE BAG. EXT. A STREET CORNER - NIGHT SEYMOUR, EMERGING FROM AN ALLEY/ CHECKS TO SEE THAT NO ONE IS AROUND AND THEN CROSSES THE STREET, STRAINING TO DRAG THE LARGE WHITE BAG WITH HIM. INT. THE SHOP - NIGHT SEYMOUR STANDS BEFORE AUDREY TWO, THE WHITE BAG AT HIS FEET. THE PLANT,, BACK-LIT, SEEMS BIGGER THAN EVER. SEYMOUR TURNS TO LEAVE. AUDREY TWO: Chop it up. Seymour stops in his tracks, appalled. SEYMOUR: What! 1 ! AUDREY Tiro Feed me l SEYMOUR: Okay, okay. Okay. EXT. A DIMLY LIT COURTYJOID - BEHIND THE SHOP STURM AND DRANG MUSIC CONTINUES. SEYMOUR LOOKS AROUND NERVOUSLY, THEN DRAGS THE WHITE BAG OUT OF THE SHOP, INTO COURTYARD. INT. THE BASEMENT SEYMOUR RUMMAGES AROUND IN THE TOOL CABINET UNTIL HE FINDS WHAT HE'S LOOKING FOR: AN AXE THE VERY SIGHT OF IT MAKES HIM WINCE. BUT WHAT MUST BE DONE, MUST BE DONE... EXT. COURTYARD SEYMOUR ENTERS WITH THE AXE, A BUCKET, AND A PILE OF OLD NEWSPAPERS. HE STARTS SPREADING THE PAPERS OUT ON THE CONCRETE* EXT. THE FRONT OF THE SHOP MUSHNIK APPEARS AT THE FRONT DOOR. THE NIGHT GATE IS DOWN AND LOCKED, OF COURSE. EXT. COURTYARD SEYMOUR GRITS HIS TEETH, CLOSES HIS EYES, AND RAISES THE AXE. ANGLE - THE COURTYARD WALL SEYMOUR'S SHADOW. HE BRINGS THE AXE DOWN. EXT. SHOP BACK DOOR MUSHNIK R FUMBLING WITH ANOTHER KEY, HEARS THE SOUND. HE TURNS. ANGLE - THE COURTYARD WALL THE SHADOW LOWERS THE AXE AGAIN. THAT SOUND. ' CLOSEUP - MUSHNIK HIS JAW DROPS. IF THIS WERE 1925, HIS HAIR WOULD STAND ON END. THE SHADOW CONTINUES ITS TASK. EXT. THE SHOP BACK DOOR MUSHNIK, STUNNED AND SICKENED, FORGETS HIS BUSINESS IN THE SHOP AND TURNS. INT. THE SHOP AS MUSIC BUILDS TO A THUNDEROUS CLIMAX, SEYMOUR IS SEEN, GINGERLY AND WITH GREAT DISTASTE, LIFTING BITS OF ORIN (AN ARM WITH A STUDDED LEATHER WRISTBAND; A HEAD FROZEN IN A STUPID GRIN) AND DUMPING THEM INTO THE PLANT'S CAVERNOUS POD. EATING SOUNDS AND THEN — THE PLANT LAUGHS — A DEEP, ECHOING, FRIGHTENING LAUGH TER THAT REVERBERATES AS WE: THE BASEMENT - FOLLOWING MORNING SUNLIGHT STREAMS THROUGH THE BASEMENT WINDOW. SEYMOUR IS ASLEEP, BUT RESTLESS. THE PLANT'S LAUGHTER STILL ECHOES IN HIS DREAMS. HE GETS UP AND LOOKS THROUGH HIS WINDOW. EXT. SKID ROW - SEYMOUR'S POV A POLICE CAR HAS PULLED UP IN FRONT OF AUDREY'S HOUSE. TWO OFFICERS, FRANK AND JOE, ARE TALKING TO HER. SEYMOUR STARTS TO DRESS, FRANTICALLY. EXT. AUDREY'S FRONT STOOP - MORNING THE OFFICERS CLIMB INTO THEIR CAR AND PULL AWAY. AUDREY SITS ON THE STOOP, VERY UPSET. SEYMOUR WAITS UNTIL THE POLICE HAVE PULLED AWAY, THEN APPROACHES FROM ACROSS THE STREET. AUDREY IS ABOUT TO CRY AND DOESN'T WANT HIM TO SEE. SHE STARTS AWAY FROM HIM, MOVING DOWN THE STREET. SEYMOUR: Audrey — what did they say to you? AUDREY: Who? SEYMOUR: The police. AUDREY: Oh, nothing. SEYMOUR: Audrey, talk to me. What*d they say? SHE GIVES IN AND STOPS. AUDREY: It's Orin... They say he's disappeared! SEYMOUR: The... police told you that? AUDREY: They suspect foul play. THEY DO? HE WAS -HEAVILY IN DEBT TO CERTAIN RUBBER -:APPLIANCE FIRMS. HIS RECEPTIONIST. SHE STARTS TO CRY AND MOVES AWAY FROM HIM. SHE TURNS A CORNER AND HAPPENS INTO — EXT. A PICTURESQUE ALLEYWAY A JUMBLE OF FIRE ESCAPES FILLS THE BACKGROUND. THE VERY WALLS SEEM TO BE TINTED LAVENDER AND BLUE — A WATERCOLOR OF URBAN ARCHITECTURE — - SOMETHING OUT OF WEST SIDE STORY." AUDREY, STILL CRYING, FINDS A TRASH CAN AND PERCHES ON IT TO SOB. SEYMOUR: Audrey... Audrey, please don't cry... Would it be... so terrible... if SCTnething had happened to him? AUDREY • Seymour, what a thing to sayl SEYMOUR: Well, would it? AUDREY: It wouldn't be terrible at all. It would be — • A miracle. Not to mention all the money I ' d save on Epsom salts and ace bandages. SEYMOUR: See? AUDREY: But I*d still feel guilty. I mean, if he met with foul play or some terrible accident of some kind, it'd partly be my fault, you see. 'Cause secretly... I wished it. SHE FIGHTS BACK TEARS. SEYMOUR WORKS UP THE NERVE TO SIT BESIDE HER. SEYMOUR: Audrey, you shouldn't waste one more minute worrying about that creep. There's a lot of guys would give anything to go out with you. Nice guys. AUDREY: I don't deserve a nice guy, Seymour. SEYMOUR: That's not true. SHE RISES AND MOVES AWAY. SHE COULD NEVER SAY THIS TO HIS FACE. AUDREY: I deserved a creep like Orin Scrivello, D.D.S. You know where I met him? In the gutter. SEYMOUR: The gutter? AUDREY: The gutter. It's a nightspot. I used to work there. I'd put on cheap and tasteless outfits... not nice ones like this. Low and nasty apparel, and I'd... SHE BREAKS. SHE SITS ON A PILE OF CRATES, WEEPING SOFTLY. MUSIC UNDER: THE INTRO TO "SUDDENLY SEYMOUR." SEYMOUR COMES CLOSE AND KNEELS BESIDE HER. SEYMOUR: Audrey, that's all behind you now. You've got nothing to be ashamed of. SEYMOUR: You're a very nice person and I always knew you were. Underneath the bruises and the handcuffs, you know what I saw? A girl I respected. I still do. Lift up your head Wash off your mascara Here. . . SEYMOUR: take my Kleenex, Wipe that lipstick away Show me your face Clean as the mornin' I know things were bad But now they're okay. HE RISES AND IS SUDDENLY FRAMED AGAINST A YELLOW MORN ING SKY, GLIMPSED AT THE END OF THE ALLEY. FOR A MOMENT HE'S GARY COOPER, JOHN GLENN, GORDON MACCREA. SEYMOUR: Suddenly, Seymour Is standing beside you You don't need no make-up Don't have to pretend Suddenly, Seymour Is here to provide you Sweet Understanding Seymour's your friend. Audrey does not sing back to him. She sings, instead, to God, her eyes brimming with tears. AUDREY: Nobody ever Treated me kindly Daddy left early Mama was poor. I ' d meet a man and I'd follow him blindly He's snap his fingers Me, I'd say "Sure" As a look of quasi-religious redemption spreads across her masacara-stained face: AUDREY: Suddenly, Seymour Is standing beside me He don't give me orders He don't condescend AUDREY: Suddenly, Seymour Is here to provide me Sweet Understanding Seymour's my friend. HE MOVES TOWARD HER. SEYMOUR: Tell me this feelin' lasts ' til forever Tell roe the bad times Are clean washed away SHE MOVES AWAY FROM HIM, UP ONTO A FIRE ESCAPE — "TO THINK." AUDREY: Please understand that It's still strange and frightenin' For losers like I've been It's so hard to say... And s'he turns, all passionate commitment. Now he's on the ground and she's on a fire escape. It's the bal- cony scene. They reach for each other through the iron bars. AUDREY: Suddenly, Seymour 1 We PULL BACK to see that Crystal, Ronette and Chiffon are lurking on another fire escape, across the alley, prepared to sing backup. SEYMOUR & GIRLS: Suddenly, Seymour 1 AUDREY: Be purified me! SEYMOUR & GIRLS: He purified youl AUDREY: Suddenly, Seymourl SEYMOUR & GIRLS: Suddenly, Seymour! AUDREY: Showed me I can — With one grand Errol Flynn gesture, Seymour pulls him- self up and floats ten feet high, up onto the fire escape beside her. SEYMOUR: Yesr you can — AUDREY: Learn how to ALL: Be more The girl that's inside me (you}! SEYMOUR: With Sweet Understanding — AUDREY: Sweet Understanding — SEYMOUR: With Sweet Understanding AUDREY . Sweet Understanding ALL: Sweet Understanding! Seymour's My (Your) Man ! And at the number's close, they're locked in the quin- tessential love-duet pose: his arms around her from behind, faces close together, eyes glistening, and mouths open to hold the last note as long as the ar- rangement demands. INT. SHOP - MORNING MUSIC: "SUDDENLY SEYMOUR" PLAYOFF. SEYMOUR ENTERS THE SHOP. HE IS ON CLOUD NINE. INT. BASEMENT SEYMOUR JUMPS ON HIS COT. FROM UNDER HIS PILLOW HE TAKES OUT A PHOTO OF AUDREY. MUSHNIK: You love her madly, don't you, Shmuck? Seymour turns around to see Mushnik standing in the shadows. SEYMOUR: Mr. Mushnik — you scared me. MUSHNIK: I scared him. After what I've seen, I scared him. Emph. You think I didn't know? I knew. I knew you lay down here on your pathetic cot and dreamed about her. But I didn't know the lengths to which you'd go, the depths to which you'd sink... SEYMOUR: What depths? What sink? What are you talking about? MUSIC IN: "SUPPERTIME INTRO," A TENSION-PRODUCING "TUBULAR BELLS"-STYLE VAMP. MUSHNIK: Little red dots all over the linoleum. . . Seymour, who had no idea they were there, loses his breath. MUSHNIK: Little red spots on the concrete outsidel! I'm talking blood, Krelbornl I'm talking under my own roof ... Mushnik is now at the tool cabinet. He opens it and grabs the axe... MUSHNIK: ... An axe murderer 1 MUSIC: A BIG CHGRO. SEYMOUR'S FACE FALLS. CLOSEUP OF SEYMOUR AS AUDREY TWO IS HEARD IN ECHO. AUDREY TWO: He's got your number now. MUSHNIK: I saw everything. CONTINUED: (2) 80 AUDREY TWO: He knows just what you done. MUSHNIK: Everything you... ugh... done to her boy*^riend. AUDREY TWO: You got no place to hide. Seymour clamps his hands over his ears so as not to hear the Demon Plant. Mushnik thinks Seymour doesn't want to hear him so he keeps going with more intensity. . . MUSHNIK: I saw you... chopping. AUDREY TWO: You got nowhere to run. SEYMOUR: It's truel I chopped him up. But I didn't kill himi AUDREY TWO: He knows your life of crime. Mushnik produces a gun and trains it on Seymour to hold him back. MUSHNIK: Tell it to the police! INT. SHOP WE NOW SEE THE PLANT ^ SINGING. AUDREY TWO: I think it's Suppertimell We INTERCUT between the shop, where the plant keeps singing, and the BASEMENT, where Mushnik is holding the gun on Seymour. Mushnik backs Seymour up the stairs as we are aware that Seymour is struggling to come up with a decent way out. AUDREY TWO: Must there be more bloodshed? AUDREY TWO: Come on, come on National Geographic! CONTINUED: 81 AUDREY TWO: Come on, come on Your future with Audrey Come on, come on, Ain't no time to turn squeamish Come on, come on I swear on all their spores. When he's gone the world will be yours! , INT. THE SHOP THE DOOR FROM THE BASEMENT OPENS. THE PLANT IS IM MOBILE. CRYSTAL, RONETTE AND CHIFFON ARE LURKING IN THE SHADOWS OUTSIDE THE SHOP WINDOW. GIRLS: Come on. . . come on. . • Come on. . • come on. . • Mushnik walks Seymour to the front door. He stops. VAMP CONTINUES UNDER as he speaks. MUSHNIK: Rrelborn, I just want to say it kills me to have to do this. CUT TO THE GIRLS OUTSIDE IN THE SHADOWS. GIRLS: It's suppertime. MUSHNIK: Considering the fact you're something of an idiot, and the man you hacked to pieces wasn't such a paragon himself..; you could get off in thirty, forty years. CUT TO THE GIRLS WHOM WE STILL SEE OUTSIDE THROUGH THE WINDOW. GIRLS: Come on. . . come on. . . CUT TO WUSBNIK. MUSHNIK: And it, would be a shame, all things considered that your... life's work shouldn't be here waiting for you. CUT TO THE GIRLS WHO ARE NOW INSIDE THE SHOP SITTING ON THE COUNTER. GIRLS: Come on... come on... CUT TO MUSHNIK. MUSHNIK: So... if you want me to... take care of this plant of yours... I assume you fertilize... CUT TO THE GIRLS WHO ARE NOW STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO SEYMOUR. GIRLS: Come on. . . come on. . . SEYMOUR: She... needs... to be fed, sir. The PLANT RUSTLES ITS LEAVES in anticipation. MDSHNIK: Fed? CUT TO THE GIRLS WHO, STILL INSIDE THE SHOP, ARE IN FRONT OF THE DISPLAY WINDOW. A COUPLE OF FILTHY BUMS ARE OUTSIDE LEERING THROUGH THE WINDOW JUST BEHIND THE GIRLS. GIRLS: Come on. . • come on. ■ • SEYMOUR: Just... potash... you know... the usual minerals and all. MUSHNIK: Of course. CONTINUED: (2) 82 As Seymour speaks he casually backs Mushnik towards the plant. SEYMOUR: And on Thursdays you give it watfe* - . . CUT TO THE GIRLS WHO ARE NOW GRINNING BEHIND THE PLANT. GIRLS: Come on. . . come on. . . CUT TO THE BUMS WHO ARE GRINNING MENACINGLY THROUGH THE WINDOW. CUT TO SEYMOUR. SEYMOUR: ... Of course you have to clean the leaves. MUSHNIK: Yes... SEYMOUR: But most importantlyr whatever you do. . . MUSHNIK: Yes... CUT TO the Girls. GIRLS: COTie on. . • come on. • • CUT TO SEYMOUR. SEYMOUR: ... whatever you do... just be sure. . . By now we see the plant has opened its vastr cavernous mouth and is waiting... CUT TO THE BUMS OUTSIDE LEERING. CUT TO MUSHNIK. MUSHNIK: Yes? . . . Yes? . . . CONTINUED: (3) 82 CUT TO THE GIRLS. THEY DON'T SING. MUSHNIK: Yes?... Yes?? All of a sudden Mushnik falls back and inside the open maw of the plant. GIRLS: ... It's suppertime! Seymour turns his back. Be can't watch what he knows will come next. With the force of a hungry shark, the jaws slam shut on Mushnik. CRUNCHING SOUNDS, punctuated by MUSICAL CHORDS, mingle with the old man's SCREAMS. . MUSHNIK: Krelborn! CRUNCH; CHORD. MUSHNIK: Nol CRUNCH; CHORD. MUSHNIK: Aaaaaaaggggghhhhhl THE GIRLS ARE NOW OUTSIDE THE SHOP AND THEY SOFTLY RETREAT BACK INTO THE SHADOWS. THE TWO BUMS CACKLE LOUDLY AT WHAT THEY'VE SEEN AND RUN AWAY. MUSIC MAKES A DIRECT SEGUE FROM "EATING OF MUSHNIK" UNDERSCORE TO THE CELLO- FLAVORED "MEEK SHALL INHERIT" VAMP. VOICE: Seymour Krelborn. . . Startled, Seymour turns to see a slick, grinning TALENT AGENT who has entered the shop. AGENT: It's so nice to meet you I'm from William Morris. The pleasure is yours. You don't answer calls So I came down in person We're dying to book you on lecturing tours. HE EXTENDS A CONTRACT TO SEYMOUR WHO JUST STANDS THERE IN CLOSEUP — THROWN. WOMAN'S VOICE {O.S.) YES, DARLING, WE'RE SENDING PHOTOGRAPHERS THURSDAY. CAMERA PULLS BACK FROM SEYMOUR AND WE SEE THAT WE ARE IN. . INT. RUSSIAN TEA ROOM-STYLE RESTAURANT SEYMOUR SITS IN A BOOTH WITH AN AGING BUT GLAMOROUS BLONDE LADY FROM LIFE MAGAZINE AND HER CREEPY, LEERING MALE ASSISTANT. THEY ARE FINISHING A VERY LAVISH LUNCH. BLONDE LADY: So get the plant ready and wear a clean shirt. Just sign this release. SHE PRODUCES A CONTRACT. CREEPY LEERING ASSISTANT: Need a pen? BLONDE LADY: Aren't you thrilled? It's the cover of Life Magazine 1 As if to bribe him, the Assistant pushes an enormous serving of something rich, cream- cove red, and cherry- topped in front of Seymour. CREEPY LEERING ASSISTANT: Dessert? We are CLOSE to Seymour's dazed expression. VOICE: I'm telling you son, it's a cinch to get ratings. AND CAMERA PULLS BACK TO REVEAL THAT WE ARE NOW IN. . INT. A TELEVISION STUDIO CONTROL ROOM BANKS OF TELEVISION MONITORS ARE IN THE BACKGROUND. THE SAME IMAGE IS ON EACH MONITOR: A SMILING PHOTO OF SEYMOUR WITH AUDREY TWO IN FRONT OF A LOGO. CONTINUED: 84 THE WORDS ON THE LOGO READ... "SEYMOUR KRELBORN' S GARDENING TIPS." A TV EXECUTIVE, WRITER AND FLUNKY ARE SITTING WITH SEYMOUR. TV EXECUTIVE: ''he title is Marvin's. THE CONCEPT IS MINE. THE FLUNKY PRODUCES A CONTRACT AND PEN AND URGES THEM ON SEYMOUR. FLUNKY: The first weekly gardening show on our network! TV EXECUTIVE: And you're gonna host it, you lucky kid. EXECUTIVE, WRITER and FLUNKY Sign! INT. TYPING POOL - DAY WE ARE CLOSE IN ON TWO TALL IMPRESSIVE LOOKING MAHOGANY DOORS. THE DOORS SWING OPEN. THEY SAY THE MEEK SHALL INHERIT YOU KNOW THE BOOK DOESN' T LIE IT'S NOT A QUESTION OF MERIT IT'S NOT DEMAND AND SUPPLY INT. LIMOUSINE - NIGHT CLOSEUP OF A CHAUFFEUR DRIVING THE CAR. HE IS BOPPING TO THE MUSIC AND SMILING BROADLY INTO CAMERA AS WE HEAR THE GIRLS SINGING IN VOICE OVER. CONTINUED: 86 GIRLS: They say the meek gonna get it And you a meek little guy CAMERA PUSHES PAST HIM TOWARD THE BACK OF THE LIMO. WE SEE THAT IT IS AN EXAGGERATED "STRETCH" LIMO... GIRLS: You know the meek are gonna get .what's comin' to 'em By and by. . . CAMERA PUSHES FORWARD TO SEE SEYMOUR SITTING IN THE BACK SEAT FLANKED BY TWO MEN URGING HIM TO SIGN A CON TRACT. A BUXOM WOMAN SITS ON SEYMOUR'S LAP OFFERING HIM CHAMPAGNE. LIMBO 87 ... MONEY FALLING IN SLOW MOTION IN FRONT OF SEYMOUR'S FACE AS SEYMOUR'S UNCONSCIOUS SINGS IN V.O. SEYMOUR: My future's starting I've got to let it Stick with that plant r and gee, My bank account will thrive The green, slow falling money has turned into green, thick, undulating plant vines. Seymour now struggles to disentangle himself from them. SEYMOUR: What am I saying No way, forget it It's much too dangerous to keep that plant alive. HE FINALLY FREES HIMSELF AND RUNS AS WE... LIMBO 88 A LONG, SEEMINGLY ENDLESS TUNNEL. CONTINUED: 8 THROUGH ITS WALLS POKE DOZENS UPON DOZENS OF HANDS AND VINES HOLDING PENS AND CONTRACTS AND MONEY AND LIQUOR BOTTLES AND CAR KEYS AND. BRAS AND PANTIES... SEYMOUR: I take .these offers That means more killing Who knew success would come with messy, nasty strings. LIMBO: A dirt floor. An hour glass sits on a short ionic column. The sand in the top of the hour glass is green, but as it falls and collects on the bottom it becomes red. Tormented and panicky, Seymour races in FROM CAMERA and runs into the distance. LIMBO: Be is nude, except for his glasses and his cap. SEYMOUR: I sign these contracts, That means I'm willing To keep on doing bloody, awful, evil things LIMBO 9 All is dark. We follow Seymour who is perspiring heavily and running with all he's got. SEYMOUR: Suddenly he stops because in front of him is a very large hand- tinted photo portrait of a jaunty, smiling Mushnik. Blood oozes down from the top of the photo. SEYMOUR: No! Nol There's only so far you can bendl SEYMOUR WHIPS AROUND TO CAMERA AND WE SEE THAT JHE IS NOW A PLANT. HE IS GREEN, WITH PLANT MARKINGS. SEYMOUR: No! No! This nightmare must come to an end! INT. BASEMENT - EXTREME CLOSEUP - NIGHT OF SEYMOUR'S FACE AS HE VIOLENTLY SITS UP FROM HIS COT... PERSPIRATION DRIPPING FROM HIM. SEYMOUR: Nol Nol Seymour, in his pajamas, at the tool chest. He grabs the axe. SEYMOUR: You've got no alternative, Seymour old boy. CUT TO; SEYMOUR NOW AT THE STAIRS LEADING TO THE SHOP. EALF CRAZED, HE CLIMBS THEM AS HE SINGS... SEYMOUR: Though it means you'll be broke again And unemployed, It's the only solution The vegetable must be destroyed. HE HAS REACHED THE TOP OF THE STAIRS. HE FLINGS OPEN THE DOOR. SEYMOUR: But then. . . There' s Audrey. Lovely Audrey... LIMBO: A promontory on top of which Audrey stands. She looks like a goddess. She wears a flowing dress and wrapped around her neck is a very, very long diaphanous scarf that extends behind her about fifty feet blown by a strong wind. SEYMOUR: If life were tawdry and impoverished as before She might not like roe She might not want me CONTINUED: 92 CAMERA HAS PULLED BACK TO A WIDE SHOT. WE SEE SEYMOUR STANDING OFF AT A DISTANCE AND LOOKING UP AT HER WITH HIS ARMS OUTSTRETCHED. SEWIOTO (V.O.) (CONT.) WITHOUT MY PLANT. . ON THE WORD "PLARTT," AUDREY RUNS PAST SEYMOUR'S WAITING ARMS AND FALLS INTO THE WAITING VINES OF AUDREY TWO WHO HAS BEEN JUST O.S. SEYMOUR: She might not love me Any more CUT TO A CLOSEUP OF SEYMOUR. BE LOOKS UP AT SOMEONE IN SOFT, SAD RESIGNATION. GIRLS: They say the meek shall inherit. CAMERA PULLS BACK AND HIGH MAKING SEYMOUR LOOK VERY SMALL. HE NOW STANDS ON A VERY LARGE CONTRACT WHICH COVERS THE ENTIRE FLOOR. A HAND EXTENDS, FROM CAMERA, TOWARD SEYMOUR. THE HAND HOLDS A CONTRACT. SE!;MOUR WHERE DO I SIGN? GIRLS: You know the book doesn't lie. The hand, and arm, have extended about fifteen feet from CAMERA to Seymour. The arm is the Agent's, whose face appears in the extreme foreground. AGENT: Right on the line. GIRLS: It's not a question of merit. CUT TO A MEDIUM SHOT OF SEYMOUR. HE TURNS AROUND AS, BEHIND HIM, THE BLONDE LADY FLOATS IN HORIZONTALLY LIKE CHAGALL'S LOVERS. BLONDE LADY: Your pen or mine? CONTINUED: (2) 92 GIRLS: It's not demand or supply. Seymour turns around completely now as a MAN rises from below like a phantom, right in front of Seymour. He holds a pen and contract. MAN 1: Paragraph nine. Seymour signs the contracts. GIRLS: You'll make a fortune, we swear it. The TV Executive pops up from behind Seymour and grabs the signed contract. TV EXECUTIVE: This copy's mine. GIRLS: If on thXs fact you rely ALL: Bye bye. So long! LIMBO 93 EXTREME CLOSEUP of a flashbulb popping. CLOSEUP of Seymour. He is being besieged by autograph hounds. More flashbulbs pop. Each flash is like a rifle shot to Seymour. He tries to escape, but the crowd hems him in. It is nightmarish. GIRLS: You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to 'em You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to 'em You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to 'em. WE SEE THAT SEYMOUR AND THE CROWD ARE ACTUALLY IN FRONT OF THE SHOP. EXT. SHOP - LATE AFTERNOON SEYMOUR TRIES TO PUSH THROUGH THE THRONG. CONTINUED: 94 GIRLS: Bye... And . . . Sye. . . SEYMOUR: Please I Please! Let me through. SECURITY MAN: Hey, get back. They're filming. Security Man pushes him back, knocking Seymour into a surly WINO. WINO: Hey, watch where you're goin' . A scuffle ensues in which Seymour is punched and man- handled by Winos and Security. INT. THE SHOP - LATE AFTERNOON A CAMERA CREW AND TV CHORUS ARE IN THE MIDST OF FILMING A SPOT FOR "DEL MONTE PRESENTS AUDREY TWO IN A SALUTE TO VEGETABLES." AUDREY STANDS TO ONE SIDE WATCHING DELIGHTEDLY. SINGERS AND DANCERS ARE DOING SONETHING SILLY AND DALLAS COWBOY CHEERLEADERISH IN FRONT OF THE PLANT. IT'S BIGGER THAN EVER AND HAS BEEN DECORATED WITH RED, WHITE AND BLUE BUNTING. SINGERS & DANCERS: Who's the best, the beautiful green one? Who? Audrey Two l 1 Who's a star if ever I've seen one? Who? Audrey Two l I Look at theml Those leaves 1 * That stem! She puts the rest to root! Yes, who makes photosynthesis seem cute? Our Au-dr«yl Au. . . Au. . . Aud. . SINGERS & DANCERS: • 1 Suddenly, right as the Singers and Dancers start to go into a dance break, the Plant collapses. The vines wilt, the leaves sag, and the pod sinks to the floor. Gasps, h moment of chaos. DIRECTOR: Cut! What the hell's goin' on? What happened to the goddamn greenery? THE DIRECTOR SEES, SEYMOUR STUMBLE IN THE FRONT DOOR. HE DOESN' T SEEM TO NOTICE THAT SEYMOUR IS BRUISED AND DISHEVELED FROM THE FIGHT OUTSIDE. SEYMOUR: It just... needs to be fed. DIRECTOR: So feed itl SEYMOUR: I can' t, not now! DIRECTOR: Then I'll feed it. Where do you • keep the plant food? SEYMOUR: It doesn't eat plant food and I can't feed it nowl Just leave me alone, will ya? All of you I Why won't you all leave me a... 1 AUDREY: Seymour 1 You're hysterical. They're only trying to help. SEYMOUR: I know... I know... I*m sorry... Seymour runs to the back door. Audrey follows him. DIRECTOR: Okay... Okay, guys, pack it up. EXT. THE COURTYARD THE SUN IS JUST BEGINNING TO SET. AUDREY DISCOVERS SEYMOUR SITTING ON A TRASH HEAP, FACE IN HANDS. SEYMOUR: What ain I gonna do? What am I gonna do? AUDREY: It's wilted before and you've always brought it back to life, somehow. ... Seymour, I think running this place all by yourself is too much for you. When did Mr. Mushnik say he'd be back? SEXMOUR: Huh? AUDREY: You know, in that note you told me he left you. The one that said he was goin' out to his sister's house in. . . SEYMOUR: Czechoslovakia. He could be gone a very long time, ... Audrey could I ask you something? AUDREY: Anything. SF2M0UR: Just suppose there' d never been an Audrey Two and I was just a nothing again, a nobody... Would you still like me? AUDREY: I'd still love you, Seymour. HE LOOKS AT HER FOR A MOMENT, THEN PULLS HER TO HIM. MUSIC: "SUDDENLY, SEYMOUR" PLAYS UNDER DIALOGUE, QUIETLY AND GENTLY. SEYMOUR: Then marry me, Audrey. I'll take you to that little development you've always dreeuned about and once we're there it'll be happy ever after » I promise. Nice little house... nice little car... and no. plants. Mo plants at all... .We'll go to Alaska! THEY SAY IT'S PRETTY THERE. SEYMOUR: Then will you? Will you marry me? AUDREY: ... Sure. SEYMOUR: You will? AUDREY: Sure! SEYMOUR: Tonight? AUDREY: Aw, sure! SEYMOUR: I'll pick you up in an hour and we'll go to City Hall! Suddenly, Seymour Is standing beside you... AUDREY: Suddenly, Seymour Showed me I can. . . Seymour, we better stop singing. I've gotta get ready! As MUSIC SWELLS, Audrey, the happiest girl in the world, flies out of the courtyard, turning back only once to blow Seymour a kiss. AUDREY: He watches her go, then closes his eyesi wishing with all his might that every- thing will turn out. 96A INT. THE SHOP 96A It's deserted now. Outside, the sun sinks lower. The plant is still wilted and lifeless. AUDREY: Seymour stands looking at it in silence for a moment, then very quietly tries to sneak past it. But just as he gets to the door, a spooky, hoarse whisper stop;, him dead in his tracks. AUDREY TWO: Feed me I SEYMOUR: Under no circumstances. AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: I will not so stop asking. AUDREY TWO: Feed me! SEYMOUR: No. No more. I can't take living with the guilt. AUDREY TWO: Tough titty. SEYMOUR: Watch your language. AUDREY TWO: Awwh. Cut the crap and bring on the meat! SEYMOUR: Okay... okay... I'll bring you meat. I'll run down to the corner and I ' 11 pick you up some ground round , how * bout that? AUDREY TWO: Don't do me no favors. SEYMOUR: Lookr it's my last offer. Yes or no? AUDREY TWO: .... You sure do drive a hard bargain. SEYMOUR: Done. Fine. Great. And don't think you're getting dessert. EXT, SKID ROW - EVENING AS THE SUN SLIPS FURTHER DOWN, WINOS GATHER AND LIGHT FIRES. SEYMOUR WALKS DOWN THE STREET AND DISAPPEARS. INT. THE SHOP - EVT^^NG AUDREY TWO EMITS A. QUIET, SATISFIED LAUGH. THE VINE CRAWLS UP THE SIDE OF THE COUNTER. WHEN IT REACHES THE TOP THE VINE GOES TO THE CASH REGISTER. ANOTHER VINE LIFTS UP THE RECEIVER AS THE NICKEL IS DEPOSITED. THE RECEIVER IS BROUGHT UP TO THE POD WHERE, IF THE POD HAD AN EAR, ITS EAR WOULD BE. INT. AUDREY'S BEDROOM HER PHONE IS RINGING. GUESS WHO? AUDREY SITS AT HER DRESSING TABLE. SOME CHEAP LUGGAGE AND A VANITY CASE ARE ON THE BED. AUDREY: Hello. Audrey Two is heard FILTERED through the receiver. The Plant breathes heavily and obscenely, then... AUDREY TWO: Hey, little lady, hello I AUDREY: Who... who is this? CONTINUED: AUDKZY TWO: You're lookin' cute as can be! AUDPEY: Is this someone I know? AUDREY TWO: You're lookin' mighty sweet. AUDREY: Seymour. AUDREY TWO: No, it ain't Seymour, it's me! Audrey happens to turn around and look through her window. EXT. THE SHOP - AUDREY'S POV IT IS THE LAST BLAZE OF SUNSET. ACROSS THE STREET, THROUGH THE SHOP'S WINDOW, SHE SEES THE PLANT... AUDREY: Oh my God! INT. AUDREY'S APARTMENT AUDREY IS NOT THERE. ALL WE SEE IS THE RECEIVER DANGL ING TOWARD THE FLOOR. INT. THE SHOP THE VINE REPLACES THE RECEIVER AS ANOTHER VINE PULLS DOWN THE LITTLE COIN RETURN SLOW. NO NICKEL. CONTINUED: AUDREY HAS JUST OPENED THE FRONT DOOR AND SHE STANDS AND STARES IN AMAZEMENT. AUDREY: I don't believe it. AUDREY TWO: Believe it, baby, AUDREY: Am I dreaming this? , AUDREY TWO: No, and you ain't in Kansas, neither. ... I need me some water in the worst way. Look at my branch, I'm drying up. Come on and give me a drink. AUDREY: I don't know i£ I should. AUDREY TWO: Eey, little lady, be nice. AUDREY: Do you talk to Seymour like this? AUDREY TWO: Sure do! I'll drink it straightl Don't need no glass and no icel Don't need no twist of limel AUDREY: All right... I'll get the can. SHE MOVES INTO THE SHOP, COWERING ALONG THE WALL, JUST INTO RANGE OF THE LARGE TENDRILS ' GRASP. IN A FLASH, IT WRAPS AROUND HER LIKE A BOA CONSTRICTOR. AUDREY TWO: And now it's Suppertime l CONTINUED: (2) AUDREY SCREAMS AND STRUGGLES. THE TENDRIL STARTS PULL ING HER TOWARD THE GAPING POD. AUDREY FIGHTS FOR ALL SHE'S WORTH, BUT THE VINES EN SNARE AND ATTACK HER FROM ALL SIDES. SHE'S BEING PULLED > .-^XORABLY TOWARD THE POD. AUDREY TWO (CONT. ) RELAX, -T3OLL AND IT'LL BE EASIER. AUDREY SCREAMS. AUDREY TWO: They're right inside! And with one great heave, the vines pull her into the pod itself. The jaws clamp down. She screams again. The shop door flies open^ Seymour rushes in and begins prying at the pod with all his might. SEYMOUR: Get off of her! Get off of her! Ee finally succeeds in getting the pod open just enough to pull her out. She is alive, but just barely. Her dress is tastefully stained with just a bit of red. HE DRAGS HER OUT OF THE SHOP, KICKING THE FIGHTING VINES AND BRANCHES OUT OF HIS WAY AS HE GOES, UNTIL HE GETS HER BEYOND THEIR REACH AND THROUGH THE DOOR. EXT. SKID ROW IT IS NIGHT NOW. THE GOLDEN GLOW OF A STREET LAMP FLOODS LYRICALLY DOWN ON THEM, AS SEYMOUR LOWERS THE DYING AUDREY TO THE MOONLIGHT PAVEMENT, AND CRADLES HER IN HIS ARMS. MUSIC COMES IN SOFTLY UNDER. SEYMOUR: Don't die, Audrey. Please, please don' t die. AUDREY: You know, the plant just said the strangest thing just now... It said that Or in and Mr. Mushnik were already inside. CONTINDED: SEYMOUR: And that's what made it so big and strong and you so fjomous? SEYMOUR: I've done terrible things, but not to you, never to you. AUDREY: But. . . I want you to, Seymour. SEYMOUR: What? AUDREY: When I die, which should be very shortly, give me to the plant so it can live to bring you all the wonderful things you deserve. SEYMOUR: You don't know what you're saying Audrey is transfigured, she's Joan of Arc, Little Eva, Mel&nie Wilkes — going out in a blaze of angelic self- lessness. AUDREY: But I do. It's the one gift I can give you. And if I'm Jji the plant, then I'm part ^ the plant. So, in a way... we'll always be... together. You'll wash my tender leaves You'll smell my sweet perfume You'll water me and care for me You* 11 see me bud and bloom. AUDREY: I'm feeling strangely happy now, Contented and serene. Oh, don't you see... CONTINUED; (2) AUDREY: Finally I ' 11 be. . . Somewhere that's... Greenl And she collapses. There, in the moonlight, under a street lamp, she /dies in his arms. MUSIC: "THE DEATH OF AUDREY," A CHORALE WITH ANGELIC VOICES AND STRING ORCHESTRA, UNDERSCORES AS SEYMOUR LIFTS HIS LOVE FROM THE GROUND. BEHIND HIM, THROUGH THE SHOP WINDOW, WE CAN SEE THE POD OPEN CEREMONIOUSLY. ANGLE — SEYMOUR HOLDING AUDREY, POD IN B.G. THE POD EMITS BEAMS OF LIGHT NOW, PLUNGING SEYMOUR AND HIS DEAD LOVE INTO DRAMATIC SILHOUETTE. HE CARRIES HER SLOWLY TOWARD THE SOURCE OF LIGHT. THE MOOD IS ONE OF WAGNERIAN SPLENDOR. IT'S GOTTER DAMMERUNG, AS SEYMOUR RITUALISTICALLY FULFILLS AUDREY'S DYING WISH AND PLACES HER GENTLY, TENDERLY, INTO THE LIGHT-FILLED POD. HE KNEELS, TEARS STREAMING DOWN HIS CHEEKS, TO SEE THE ACT TO COMPLETION. AUDREY SLOWLY BEGINS TO SLIP FURTHER AND FURTHER AWAY FROM US, INTO THE LIGHT BEAMING FROM THE PLANT'S "THROAT." AT LAST, SHE'S GONE. SEYMOUR RISES, DESTROYED, AND RUNS FROM THE SHOP — OUT ONTO THE STREET. EXT. SKID ROW SEYMOUR FINDS THE FIRST FIRE ESCAPE HE CAN AND CLIMBS IT. EXT. ROOFTOP MUSIC: THE LAST' NOTES OF THE "DEATH OF AUDREY" CHORALE TRAIL OFF, GIVING WAY TO TRAFFIC SOUNDS, AS SEYMOUR REACHES THE TOP OF THE BUILDING, STUMBLES TO THE EDGE, AND LOOKS DOWN. - THE STRETTT - SEYT-IOITR'S POV. IT SPINS BELOW HIM, OF COURSE. EXT. RCX)FTOP SEYMOUR TAKES A DEEP BREATH AND PREPARES TO JUMP... I'/HEN HE HEARS A VOICE THAT STOPS HIM. VOICE (O.C.) MR. KRELBORN. SEYMOUR TURNS TO SEE — PATRICK MARTIN, A MIDWESTERN BUSINESSMAN IN A GREEN SUIT. WE WILL NEVER KNOW HOW HE GOT THERE. MARTIN: Patrick Martin. I'm in Licensing and Marketing. I wanna show you something. Seymour tiirns away and prepares once more to jump. SEYMOUE: I'm not interested. MARTIN: Aah, but you will be. Look... As MARTIN speaks he carefully takes something out of his "briefcase. MARTIN: ... .1 took the liberty of taking a cutting from that sunazing plant of yours and see what it grew in just a couple of days... MARTIN has taken out a tiny AUDREY TWO... about a few incbes tall but looking e jiaut ly like the real AUDREY TWO. MARTIN: It sits in a delightful, well designed container on which aire written the words: "Audrey Two". Seymour, surprised and uncomprehending, just stares at it. MARTIN: The design boys made the little pot. Cute,' huh? Get the idea? My firm is willing to pay you a reasonable ajnount to take leaf cuttings.. .develop little Audrey Two's... and sell them to florist shops — supermarkets across the nation. MARTIN: Why pretty soon every household in America could have one. These last words echo in Seymour's confused and frazzled mind. ECHO: JIave one... have one... have one... have one... Seymour shakes'Tiis "head to banish the echo. Something begins to dawn on him. MARTIN: Imagine it boy. We'll make a fortune'. Audrey Twos everywherel ECHO: Everywhere. . .'everywhere. . .everywhere. . . everywhere'. ... MARTIN: Thi5_^thing could be bigger than Hula Hoops'. ~ ECHO: Hula hoops... Hula hoops... Hula hoops... MARTIN , • • Whattya say Mr. Krelborn? Martin is "giving his best salesman's smile, his eyes fixed on Seymour, waiting for an answer. ECHO: Seymour looks at 'the tiny plant as, unseen by Martin,' it subtly turns and opens' its tiny moiith at Seymour' in an almost malicious, silent smile. Seymour is suddenly possessed of complete understanding. His face becomes a mask of rage and resolve. ECHO: Without another word he- races dotm the fire escape. MARTIN: Mr. Krelborn'. Mr. Krelbornl Hey'. We don't bsve to deal with you, you knowl A goddamned vegetable's public domainl Tou ask our lawyers I INT. THE SHC3P SEYMOUR BURSTS THROUGH THE DOOR AND FACES THE PLANT, WHICH IS EVEN BIGGER, STRONGER, AND HEALTHIER NOW. IT DWARFS HIM COMPLETELY. SEYMOUR: Every household in Americal That's what you had in mind all along, isn't it? AUDREY TWO: No shit, Sherlock. SEYMOUR: We're not talking about one hungry plant here J We're talking about... World conquest! AUDREY TWO: You got iti SEYMOUR: You ate the only thing I ever loved! ! The plant, laughing, draws itself up to its full height and begins to sing from old-fashioned Rock and Roll. AUDREY TWO: I used to hear the people talk about That old King Kong. They used to say he was the meanest. But them folks was wrong. He climbed the Empire State, Shoot, I could climb in half the time, But climbin' ain't my gig. I'm just bad! I'm real bad! I'm bad! Seymour is at the counter. AUDREY TWO: He opens the drawer and takes out the gun and loads it with bullets. AUDREY TWO: You know Godzilla was a monster. He was mighty mean. Now, even I had to respect him, "Cause the boy was green. But when he said to me "Hey, Audrey, you ain't all that tough," I had to show that leapin' lizard I was tough enough! Seymour aims and FIRES at the plant. AUDREY TWO: AUDREY TWO (cont. ) HE SAID "GAD!" BE FIRES AGAIN. AUDREY TWO: ■Don' t get mad!" And AGAIN. CONTINUED: (2) AUDREY TWO: "Boy you're badl" The bullets just bounce off. Seymour runs down to the basement. AUDREY TWO (cont. ) That' s- right, I'm bad! BACKUP VOICES: Badl AUDREY TWO: Bad! BACKUP VOICES: Bad! AUDREY TWO: So I ain't worried 'bout your biggest guns I'm just too badl Seymour returns from the basement with the axe. He tries chopping the vines. Every time he swings, the vine moves and he misses... and he smashes a piece of the shop. BACKUP: Bad! AUDREY TWO: Bad! BACKUP: Badl AUDREY TWO: I'm ten feet tall and weight at least two tons: I'm extra badl Audrey Two's littler pods sing backup as the big one sings lead. LITTLE PODS: Bad! AUDREY TWO: Bad! LITTLE PODS: Bad! CONTINUED: (3) SEYMOUR TRIES TO GET THE LITTLE PODS WITH THE AXE BUT THEY'RE TOO FAST FOR HIM AS HE SMASHES THE WALL, THE FLOOR, THE COUNTER. AUDREY TWO: Go on and bitch and whine and wail and curse Too badl I'm bad! LITTLE PODS: Bad! AUDREY TWO: Bad! LITTLE PODS: Bad! Seymour's had it. He just throws the axe at Audrey Two. The plant catches it and flips it from vine to vine. It gives Seymour a little juggling show. AUDREY TWO: And if you mess with me, I'll just get worse! The plant heaves the axe at Seymour. Seymour side- steps it in the nick of time and it goes crashing through a window. Seymour's really angry. During the following lyrics he throws a chair at the plant. It catches the chair. AUDREY TWO: He throws a small table at the plant. It catches the table. He throws a shovel. It catches the shovel. AUDREY TWO (cont. ) One day I met the Bride of Frankenstein, Just one encounter and she called me, "Mr. AUDREY TWO: Audrey, sir." CLOSEDP of Seymour grabbing the cash register to throw at the plant... but it's too heavy for him. But damn itl... he's not giving up and... yes he's lifting it! But no. CAMERA PULLS BACK and we see a vine wrapped around it. AUDREY TWO: It's the plant who's lifting it up and out of Seymour's arms. AUDREY TWO: So' it's a cinch no puny baldy of a botanist Is gonna be a half a match, for me when I get pissed. You got it. Dad? CONTINUED: (4) THE PLANT IS NOW HOLDING AND WAVING THE CHAIR, THE SHOVEL, AND THE TABLE... AND THE CASH REGISTER. CLOSEUP OF SEYMOUR. HIS M. AUDREY TWO: You been had! Oh I'm badi Seymour tries to get away, but each time he tries, a vine hurtles past him and tears a hole in the wall, sending off sparks from severed electrical lines, and spewing water into the room from busted pipes. AUDREY TWO: Seymour goes to the left, a vine shoots out to the left and smashes through the wall. Seymour goes to the right, a vine careens to the right smashing through the wall. Each vine is its own Bruce Lee. No fuckin' around. The plant is serious ! AUDREY TWO (cont. AUDREY TWO: ) So come and get me, kid, I dare you. Try and make your kill. I'll make you sorry you was messin' with my chlorophyll! The plant rips the radiator out of the wall sending a cloud of steam spewing into the room. It pulls the radiator apart like it was a toy accordion. AUDREY TWO: I hope you're gettin' close to ready now to end this fuss These foolish efforts to undo me is so te-di-ous. Getting a bit bored with it all, the plant flings its vines to the ceiling and holds on to the rafters. AUDREY TWO: It raises its pot about five fee from the floor and bounces and swings as it sings... AUDREY TWO (cont. ) See, all your methods are so corny, And so childish. And so undergrad. They jiist an exercise in stupid! AUDREY TWO: Why not face it Seymour I an Baa-aa-aad l Audrey Two goes for the big finish: with a gargantuan yank of the rafters it createe an avalanche of brick, wood, and plaster that rages down over the Plant and Seymour. Before the dust has even settled we hear the . AUDREY TWO: Plant laughing triumphantly. - The shop looks like it has just survived the blitzkrieg. The walls are partially demolished chunks of ceiling have caved in. AUDREY TWO: On the other side of what used to be the shop, Seymour, filthy, wounded, and exhausted emerges from under a pile of rubble. AUDREY TWO: Lazed, but sensing he is still in danger, he quickly scrambles, rolls, falls, and crawls away from the shop and into the street out of reach of the mocking Plant. AUDREY TWO: Breathing heavily and seemingly half -mad he takes the heroic stature of a mad prophet or of Kevin McCarthy in Invasion of the Body Snatchers as he shouts.., SEYMOITR: I'll warn 'eml I»ll warn •enl I'll tell 'em' you' re comingl The htunan race won't take this lyiiig downl And wherever. your kind grows, whatever you try... WE'LL BE WAITING FOR YOU l Seymour turns and runs pushing his way through a few bums that have been watching. SEYMOUB: They're coming'. They're comingl Don't feed 'eml Don't feed the plantsl Don't feed the plants I As Seymour exits screaming, ve hear the rumbling, demonic laughter of the Plant in the distance. SEYMOUB: The bums too begin cackling until we are left with the almost deserted streets echoing with dark, ominous laughter. LIMBO. AMERICAN FLAG/-" ' ' ,\ MUSIC: A TENSE RHYTHM BEGINS WHICH GROWS INTO GRAND MAGISTERIAL MUSIC— THE INTRO TO "SUBSEQUENT TO THE EVENTS". A HU.PRE AMERICAN FLAFR FILLS THE FRAME. IT IE HEIVI]Y BACK-LIT MAKING IT SNEM LUMINESCENT. CRYSTAL: Subsequent to the events You have just witnessed Similar events in cities Across America... Events which bore a striking Hesemblance To the ones you have just seen Began occurringl INT. GARDEN SHOP. DAY AN ECU OF THE WORDS "AUDREY TWO'S" FILLS THE SCREEN. CAMERA PULLS BACK TO SEE THAT THESE WORDS ARE PART OF A SIGN: "YESL WE HAVE AUDREY TWO'S ON SALE HERE'." CAMERA TRUCKS BY A VERY LON^R LINE OF BEAMING CUSTOMERS WAITING AT THE CHECK-OUT COUNTER EACH HOLDING ONE OR MORE TINY AUDREY TWO'S. GIRLS: Subsequent to the events You have just witnessed Unsuspecting jerks From Maine to California Made the acquaintance of A new breed of flytrap And got sweet -talked Into feeding it Blood I .Dissolve to: INT. SEARS BASEMENT. DAY. CLOSE-UPS OF DOZENS OF HANDS GRASPING FOR THE TINY AUDREY TWO'S." A SCREAMING, PUSHING THRONG OF PEOPLE ARE MASHED UP AGAINST A COUNTER BEHIND WHICH ARE >»«»»DREDS OF AUDREY TWO'S. PEOPLE ARE SHOVING , SCREAMING , WAVING MONEY AS THE SALES PEOPLE DO THEIR BEST TO HELP. KICKING OFF THE AUDREY TWO'S AND SCREAMING. GIRLS: Thus the plants Wked their terrible will Finding jerks Who would feed Then their fill And the plants Proceeded to grow... And grow. INT. HOUSE. NIGHT BEDROOM OF B SUBURBAN HOME, A MIDDLE-AGED COUPLE ARE "LYING IN BED. ALL WE 'SEE ARE THEIR FEET IN TFIE FOREGROUND. AND BEGAN WHAT THEY CAME HERE TO DO \INIICH WAS ESSENTIALLY TO.. EAT CLEVELAND'. AND DESMPINESL, AND PEORIA'. ■CHOBUS.(V.O.) HERE I COME FOR HERE I COME FOR HERE I COME FOR YOU'. I III EXT. NEW JERSEY. NIGHT IN THE BACKGROUND I-LANHATTAN IS ON FIRE. IN THE FOREGROUND TWO OR THREE MORE AUDREY TWO'S ARE ATTACKING., A MIND BOGGLING MASS OF LEAVES, VINES, TENDRILS, AND ROOTS. ■ THEY 'RE. HERE 11 THEY'RE HERELL RUNLL; THEY'RE HERELLLL' ' CHORUS: Hold your hat And hang onto your soul I Something's comin' To eat the world whole I If we fight it HE TURNS AND RUNS TO MID-BACKGROUND SCREAMING, TRYING TO HELP THE OTHERS FIGHT THE PLANT. AS WE SEE CARS OVERTURNED, BRDKEN FIRE HYDRANTS .SPEWING WATER, DOWNED ELECTRICALIILSNES CRACKLING WITH SPARKS, POLICE AND NATIONAL GUARD SOLDIERS FIRING AWAY, FIRES BURNING OUT OF CBRITROL IN THE DISTANCE. QLMEXF" UPON THEM AND: US. .ADVANCING MENACINGLY, INEXORABLY TO CAMERA AND, OPENING ITS V.". :, VVI^^ CAVERNOUS MAW IT SEEMS TO SWALLOW THE • CE^**^ER0^&S IT COMPLETELY BLACKS OUT THE SCREEN, ARE LEFT WITH THE HORRIBLE SOUNDS OF CATACLYSMIC DESTRUCTION. FADE UP: "THE.:END"— FOLLOVFFID BY— "?1?17" WE'VE STILL GOT A CHANCEL BUT -WHATEVER THEY OFFER YOUL THOUGH THEY'RE SLOPPIN' THE "FROU^. FOR YOUL PLEASE WHATEVER THEY OFFER YOU. DON'T FEED THE PLA-AH-ANTS '. ». MUSIC.