perf: diagnose memory growth — mallinfo2, smaps attribution, rocksdb caps
- mallinfo() → mallinfo2() for accurate metrics past 2 GiB
- add smaps_rollup + smaps parsing: relay_smaps_rss_kb, relay_smaps_anon_kb,
relay_heap_rss_kb, relay_stack_rss_kb for heap/stack/mmap attribution
- rocksdb: max_open_files=256 (was unlimited), write_buffer_size=16M per CF
(was 64M default × 3 CFs = 192M memtable overhead)
- metrics buffer 12K → 16K
Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>